


What Truly Matters

by StoriesbyReese



Series: All That Matters [2]
Category: Stargate SG-1
Genre: DADT, DADT Repeal, Developing Relationship, F/F, Family, Femslash, Fluff, Friends to Lovers, Romance, Squad as family
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-26
Updated: 2020-08-16
Packaged: 2021-03-05 23:54:29
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 32,914
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25533934
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/StoriesbyReese/pseuds/StoriesbyReese
Summary: Set before 'Saving her is all the Matters' this story explores how Sam Carter and Janet Fraiser go from friends to lovers.Unable to continue hiding from how they feel for each other, Samantha and Janet decide to take the risk of figuring out how to act on those feelings, how to have a relationship, and how to keep saving the galaxy while loving each other.
Relationships: Jack O'Neill/Laira, Samantha "Sam" Carter/Janet Fraiser
Series: All That Matters [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1843264
Comments: 6
Kudos: 35





	1. Chapter 1

She wasn't sure it wasn't a dream. The events leading up to it had been stressful to say the least so maybe it had been a dream. They had sent a M.A.L.P to P9C-372, which triggered some kind of energy being to come through the Gate and highjack Samantha Carter's body. The being, which they had called the Entity, had come to destroy them because it had preserved them as a threat to its kind. It had taken control of Sam’s body, holding it hostage. It knew from watching them while it was in the computer systems and from accessing Sam's mind, that the others wouldn't hurt Sam, making her a safe place from which to work against them. Sam could do little more than silently scream in her own consciousness and watch as everyone she cared about tried to get the damn thing to give her up.

Jack had pushed the Entity, telling it that he would send a fleet of M.A.L.Ps to its planet to wipe out all of its kind if it didn't give up Sam's body. The Entity reacted in a fit of rage and fear, and after breaking loose of the restraints keeping it confined to a bed in the infirmary it tried what Jack would call a Hail Mary, a suicide attack. Cornered in a hallway the Entity attacked by surging its energy into the wires and connections closest to it. Somehow during this process Sam's consciousness was also uploaded into the memory nest the Entity had built for its self in the maintenance bay. It was while she was in the base's computer system that Sam saw things that she wouldn't have normally allowed herself to see.

She and Janet Frasier had been friends from almost the very moment they'd met in General Hammond's office when Janet first arrived to take on the position of their Chief Medical Officer. The first thing Hammond had done, as was his custom being the proud papa type he was, was to introduce their new doctor to SG-1 there most elite team, and the ones Janet would be most likely seeing the most of. Sam had never been one to make friends easily but there had just been something about the smaller woman that had put Sam at ease. Janet had been easy to be around, easy to talk to, and didn't seem to be bothered whenever Sam geeked out, as Jack called it. In fact, the petite doctor could hold her own in scientific and intellectual conversations, which had made it a pleasure for Sam to spend time with her. Their friendship grew over the weeks and months to come, especially after the incident with Hathor. As it turned out their little doctor was quite the badass, and that earned Janet even more respect and admiration from Sam. When Sam rescued Cassandra, and Janet had agreed to be her guardian on Earth, the friendship between the two women became the foundation for an odd little partnership. Sam wasn't ready, willing, or able to be a mother to anyone, not even Cassie who she'd bounded with and cared deeply for, but Janet was. Janet was more than ready, willing, and able to take the frightened, lonely little girl into her home and her heart. Janet would be Cassie's mother and Sam would be around to be more of a cool aunt, it was perfect for them both.

When Sam’s feelings for Janet began to grow and change, it frightened her at first. She didn’t want to lose what they had, nor did she want to risk her career. So, it was easy for Sam to make the choice to bury those feelings deep down and hide from them. She had too. She used the rules and regulations set down by the U.S. military and the government, and her own fears of losing her best friend and the little girl she loved so dearly, to remind herself why she could never ever act on or express those feelings. Detached from her body the way she was when the Entity took control, the emotional defenses she'd put into place were no longer there, and Sam could no longer pretend that there wasn't something more between her and Janet.

Sam had been able to watch the world through surveillance cameras and microphones while suspended in the Entity’s nest of hard drive servers and processing cores. She had been able to see the look of horror and fear on Janet's face after Jack's second shot with the zat gun. The first shot from a zat stunted, the second killed. After the initial look of panic, Sam could see Janet’s expression shift into something far more dangerous. Janet had given Jack a withering look that said if he'd just taken something precious from her, someone she loved, that if Sam was dead she would blame him for her death for the rest of her life. What Sam hadn’t seen was the look on Jack’s face. Jack knew in that moment that Ol' Doc Frasier loved Samantha Carter as much as he did. Poor Jack. Months before the Entity situation he and his team had been faced with the threat of goa'uld sleeper agents and for a short time during their investigation it had been thought that he and Sam were one of these Za'tarc things. They weren't of course, but what made the Tok'ra's Za'tarc machine think they were sleeper agents was the fact that they were both hiding memories and emotions. Jack was concealing his feelings for Sam, and as it turned out, Sam had been hiding her feelings for Janet.

Sam did her best to avoid Janet after that forced reveal; because of course her best friend had been there, medically monitoring and offering moral support from the gallery. Work helped a lot in her avoidance. There were alien human descendants to save from an automated terra forming ship, and then send off to their lost home world after helping them find it. There were colonels and Jaffa to rescue from failed test flights. Space mines to reprogram. A time loop of some kind that she didn't remember, but Jack and Teal’c seemed to. She still wondered why Jack had asked her to never ever eat blue jello in front of him again, especially when Janet was around. The trip to Egypt looking for Osiris had been a little awkward since Janet was with her on that one, but they'd been on a mission and they'd had Daniel along to keep them focused on finding the accidently freed goa'uld.

Everything that happened with the Entity had forced Sam to stop avoiding Janet. Once she'd made her presence in the computer known and her consciousness was downloaded back into her body, Sam had to process what she'd seen and heard while in the base’s systems. The way Janet's voice cracked painfully when she'd told Jack of the living will Sam had. The way Janet had fought for her life, her unwillingness to let Sam go. Having her body, mind, and emotions back meant Sam had to deal with all of that on top of how it felt when Janet's face was the first thing she saw, her touch the first thing she felt, her soap and shampoo the first thing she smelled, and her voice the first thing she heard, when she finally regained consciousness. Sam had barely done any of that when she found herself alone in the infirmary with Janet listening to her best friend scold her for scaring her like that, and then suddenly out of the blue Janet's hands were holding her face so tenderly and then Janet's lips were pressed to her own.

It was the kiss Sam wasn't sure about. Had it been a dream? Or had it been real? In the week that followed while Sam recovered in the infirmary neither of them spoke of the kiss. Janet smiled, she held Sam's hand, and she teased her friend as she kept a close eye on her recovery. They talked about official base news and scuttlebutt, they talked about Cassie, they talked about needing vacations and movies they wanted to see. Anything and everything but the kiss. Now that Sam was out of the infirmary and free to get on with her life, she decided maybe they should talk about the kiss. It was the scariest thing Sam had even done, and she'd done some pretty scary things since joining the SGC, but Sam needed to know. What did that kiss mean?

Pulling up outside of Janet's house Sam shut off her car and sat there for a few moments. Was she really about to walk into her best friend's house and ask her why she’d kissed her? Was this really a good idea? If the kiss meant Janet felt something more for Sam than just friendship, that she felt the way Sam felt about her, then what? They could never be together. They were both women, women in the Air Force, they could never be together in that kind of way. There were rules, regulations that said they couldn’t be who they truly were and still serve. Or at least, Sam couldn’t be truly herself and still serve, she shouldn’t assume anything when it came to Janet. For all Sam knew Janet’s kiss had been a spur of the moment expression of relief and gratitude that her friend was still alive after having seen her presumably killed. That kiss didn’t necessary mean what Sam wanted it to mean.  
Sam finally reached for the key in the ignition after taking a deep breath. This was a bad idea. She should just start the car and leave, that would be the smart thing to do. Pulling the key out of its slot Sam opened the car door and stepped out. Stuffing her keys into the pocket of her jeans Sam made her way up to Janet's front door. This was a bad idea. She balled her fist and raised it to knock but stopped just short. Did she have a right to do this? This wasn't just about her and how she felt and her career, this was about Janet too. Janet hadn't brought it up, she hadn't made a big deal about it, maybe Sam shouldn't. This was a bad idea. 

Taking a deep breath Sam knocked on Janet's door.

The sudden knock made Janet jump. She wasn't expecting anyone. Cassie was already out with her friends for an afternoon at the mall, so Janet doubted it was someone for her. They rarely got drop in visitors. In fact, the most common drop in visitor was Sam. Janet sighed softly. Sam. Even though they saw each other on a nearly daily basis, Janet missed Sam. Ever since Sam's big secret was revealed she'd been avoiding Janet, and to be honest that hurt. Janet knew Sam well enough to know why Sam had been avoiding her, but that didn't make it any easier on her. She understood that Sam used the rules and regulations of the military as a shield, a protective layer between herself and the hurt and pain she associated with love. Janet had been an adult when her father died, and it had been one of the hardest things she'd ever been through. She couldn't imagine how devastating it must be to lose your mother at such a young and vulnerable age the way Sam had. Though after taking in Cassie she had at least a vague idea. When Sam's mother died things got a little skewed emotionally for her. She'd been angry with Jacob, blaming him for the accident, and yet she needed him so badly that she would have done anything to get his attention, his approval. Janet never doubted that Sam would have joined the military on her own, it was the only way for her to reach her dreams, but joining the Air Force had become the link to Jacob she so desperately needed. Of course, this put a wedge between herself and her brother Mark. Love and family had become complicated for Sam. The Air Force, the SGC, they made sense, they were a safe place for Sam. So, when Janet sat down and really looked at things she could see and understand why Sam was acting the way she was. But logic and emotion were so often like oil and water, and that tended to make already complicated things even more complicated. 

Janet hadn't approached Sam about the subject of their feelings just for Sam's sake. Despite the fact that she'd been over the moon to find out Sam felt the same way she did, Janet knew that it couldn't go further than just knowing. She had worked really hard to make a life for herself after her disastrous sham of a marriage. She had worked hard to earn her rank and position in the Air Force and in the SGC, and she'd proven time and again while at SGC that she was a valuable member of the team. Hell, just keeping Daniel alive on a weekly basis should have her on the fast track to general. The kinds of things she was faced with day to day challenged her in a way she absolutely loved; she got to use her skills not only as a doctor but also a scientist. The Stargate gave her a chance to be a healer, a researcher, and even a solider from time to time. Though the latter had been a little jarring at first. Following the Hathor takeover Janet had decided to refresh her combat skills. She'd basically put herself back into boot camp and continued to work with one of the training sergeants and Teal'c.

Pursuing a relationship with Sam would mean knowingly violating the military code of conduct as well as disregarding the regulation against fraternizing. Though they could get around that part. Unlike Sam and Jack, Sam and Janet weren't in the same direct chain of command. Sam might outrank her, for the moment, but as chief medical officer Janet's command exceeded Sam's. They'd be ok on the fraternizing front, but Don't Ask Don't Tell still stopped them in their tracks. Janet knew damn well there were LGBT service men and women, hell she was even sure there were some right there in the Mountain, but as long as DADT was in place she and Sam would have to keep a relationship secret. So much of their lives were already wrapped up in secrets, could they honestly add another?

Funny thing is that Janet knew deep down if it meant having something real and lasting with Sam, she'd put her double bars in the General's hand and walk away without hesitation. Would Sam do the same? She didn't honestly know, and she would never ask her too. Things were just fine the way they were. Sam was her best friend, she was there for her and Cassie whenever they needed her, and anything more was a nice dream but just a dream. Janet just hoped she hadn't ruined what they had by kissing her. She honestly had no clue why she'd given in and kissed Sam. She knew it was out of pure relief that Sam was alive, but Sam had nearly died before and she'd always managed to keep herself under control. Maybe it was because she knew how Sam felt about her now, or maybe it was because she'd witnessed the whole thing. Normally she got Sam after the fact, this time she'd heard the whine of the zat gun, felt the slight buzz in the air from the energy weapon's discharge, inhaled the stench of singed hair and heated ozone, and saw Jack O'Neill standing there holding the weapon as Sam's body crumpled to the floor.

When she'd been talking to Jack about Sam's living will, all Janet could think was ‘I never told her I loved her too. She'll never know I feel the same way, that she isn't alone, and I'm here if she really wanted me.’ After she'd finished yelling at Sam for scaring her again and Sam's voice took on that soft innocent tone as she said she was sorry and then flashed her that cheeky grin, Janet just couldn't stop herself. She kissed Sam. When she closed her eyes at night Janet could still feel the way Sam's face felt in her hands, the soft warmth of her lips, the race car pace her heart had set in her chest. It was a perfect moment; one Janet would always cherish because she was fairly certain it would be the only time; she'd get to kiss Samantha Carter.

The second set of knocks on the door brought Janet out of her thoughts and on her feet. When she finally opened the door, she was more than a little surprised to see the subject of those thoughts standing there on her welcome mat. "Sam?"

"Hi." Sam said with a small smile.

"Hi." Janet replied, blinking her bright brown eyes in surprise as well as against the sudden light of the sun.

There was an awkward moment of silence between them before Sam asked, "Can I come in?"

Janet nodded, slightly berating herself for not inviting Sam in on her own. "Yes, of course."

"Thanks." Sam said as she walked past Janet who'd stepped aside to let her in.

Jumping to the most oblivious reason for Sam's unexpected visit Janet said, "Cassie's not here." As she closed the front door behind them. “She went to the mall with her friends.” 

"That's ok." Sam said as she turned to face Janet. "I'm not here to see Cass. I'm here to talk to you."

There was instant concern in Janet’s eyes and automatically she started looking Sam over for signs of pain or injury. "Are you ok, Sam?"

"I'm fine, Janet." Sam said with a nervous yet reassuringly warm smile. 

Once she was sure Sam was alright Janet led her into the living room, offering her a seat on the sofa beside her before sitting herself. Sam's gaze locked with her own and stayed like for a moment longer than it normally would. There were times in the past when Sam would come over to talk because she knew she could trust Janet and that Janet would understand. Janet knew of the guilt, anger, sadness, and remorse Sam was often left with following a mission just as Sam knew of the same whenever Janet lost a patent or came close to it. Some nights they would talk for hours on end while other nights were spent sharing a bottle of wine, a bar of dark chocolate and their conversations consisted of soft sighs and mumbled grunts. The extended gaze between them had Janet feeling a bit of sudden nervousness which made her ask, "Wine?"

"It’s not even noon yet, Janet." Sam said with a chuckle. "Besides, I want my head clear for what I have to say."

Janet saw something in Sam's eyes that she'd never seen before and she was instantly flooded with a mix of emotions ranging from fear to excitement. “Ok, so, what’s on your mind Sam?” 

Sam still wasn't sure this was the right thing to do. She was anxious and scared but in a way she'd never felt before. This felt like if this went wrong it would be more devastating than anything she'd faced in the past. And if this went well, then her life was about to get a hell of lot more complicated, but it would totally be worth it.

"Sam?" Janet said softly as she put her hand on Sam's knee.

Sam took a breath and just said it, "You kissed me."

"I…" Janet was not expecting that. She’d been kind of low key hoping for it, but not really expecting it. She pulled her hand away, but continued looking at Sam. She wondered if Sam could hear how hard her heart was pounding right now. "Yes. I did."

Sam sighed softly in relief. "Ok, so not a dream. It was real. I knew it was real."

There was relief in Sam’s bright blue eyes and that damn adorable smirk on her lips, which in turn made Janet smile. "You thought it might be a dream?"

"Yeah." Sam blushed a little.

Janet’s warm smiled morphed into more of a teasingly playful smirk as she daringly asked, "Do you often dream of me kissing you?"

Before she could stop herself, Sam was saying, "Yes." The smirk said she dreamed about more than just a kiss and when she realized what she was doing Sam blushed even more and quickly ducked her head until she could get her face uncontrolled again.

Janet’s heart fluttered in a way she hadn’t ever felt before, and her smile softened, though her eyes sparkled with the implications. 

"What did it mean, Janet?" Sam asked next and then turned to look at her friend again. "The kiss, I mean, what did the kiss mean?"

Janet was quiet and still for several long seconds before shifting in her seat to face Sam a little better. Now she felt like the one dreaming. She'd been so sure something like this would never happen that this had to be a dream, right? Only the warmth she felt from sitting so close to Sam, the faint smell of Sam's perfume, and the typhoon of butterflies in her stomach told her this was all very real. "I was so relieved that you were alive after everything that had happened and being so overwhelmed by it all made it hard for me to hold back this time."

Sam raised an eyebrow at that. "Do you hold back a lot?"

"Yes." Janet admitted.

"Oh." Sam said with a crooked smile. "Why?"

"Why?" Janet asked, her voice taking on a tone that said she couldn't believe Sam would ask that, while her eyebrow was doing a very good imitation of Teal'c’s signature expression. Sam knew why.

"Yeah." Sam replied. "Why?"

Janet almost looked angry about the question now. "You know why, Sam. You were willing to be put into a coma because of the reason why."

"I almost died, Janet." Sam said softly.

"Yes. I know." Janet replied. She couldn't bear to look at Sam just then so she turned away. "You do that a lot."

Things were getting a little tense and that wasn't the mood Sam had been going for, so she decided to defuse things a little. "Not as much as Daniel."

There was that damn cheeky smirk and playful tone that Janet just couldn't ignore. Janet sighed. "SG-1 is such a pain in my ass."

"Yeah but you love us anyway." Sam said quickly.

"Some of you more than others." Janet smirked, stealing a glance at the woman beside her as they both relaxed from their easy banter. 

"I always knew you played favorites." Sam teased. "It's Teal'c isn't it?"

"I've never kissed Teal'c." Janet said simply. At least not that she was aware of. She wished they knew more about what happened in that time loop.

Sam couldn't help but smile. "We're really dancing around this, now aren't we?"

"Well you do really like dancing." Janet pointed out.

Silence came over them both as they tried to regroup. They were flirting, so that had to mean something right? Sam was getting the impression that she wasn't about to ask Janet to take a risk she wasn't willing to take, but it still wasn't easy. Her first instinct was to protect Janet. And protecting her would be not putting her into a risky situation, not asking her to jump in headfirst right alongside her. "I take a lot of risks, Janet.” Sam begin despite any lingering reservations about this. “Every time I go through the Stargate or work on some piece of alien tech I know nothing about, I’m taking a risk.” She paused a moment to focus on Janet, and to appreciate what she was about to do for herself. “But I'm taking those risks for the benefit of other people. I've never taken a risk for just myself, I mean, not any kind of meaningful risk. The fast cars and motorcycles don't count."

"It wouldn't be easy Sam." Janet said softly.

"Nothing worth having is easy." Sam replied.

That was a cliché but very true. It was in no way easy raising a little girl who was the only survivor of a planet wide genocide, who's been used to hurt people, and then found herself lost and alone on a strange planet with strange people and customs. It was however the most important, most meaningful, most joyous thing Janet had ever done. Having Cassandra in her life was worth everything to Janet, and so was Sam. "If you're willing, Sam, then so am I."

"Really?" Sam squeaked in surprise.

Janet laughed softly. "Yes, really."

"Ok then." Sam said with the biggest smile. "Um, so, I guess, um, dinner? Saturday night?"

Janet returned that bright smile with one of her own. "It's a date."


	2. Chapter 2

They went out to dinner together all the time as friends. This was both a good thing and a problem. The good part was that no one would question Sam and Janet going out for an evening together because it was just something they did together already. Several people on base had heard one of them at some point ask the other about having a girls' night out or a movie night in. So, it wasn’t unusual for Sam and Janet to spend their downtime together. But there in lied the problem, because they did spend a lot of their downtime together how was Sam going to make their official first date something special? She spent every moment she wasn't thinking about work thinking about her date with Janet. She decided it would be dinner and a movie, a very classic first date. The trick would be to make it different than every other time they'd gone out to see a movie together. They'd talked about their favorite movies before, so Sam knew Janet's tastes, even the ones she considered guilty pleasures, and decided to use that knowledge to formulate a plan. Sam would set something up that was a little more private and personal, but would still have the comfort and ease that came along with spending their time together. Or at least she hoped that’s how it would work out. As the ideas started flowing, now that she had a starting off point, Sam smiled.

"What's the dopy look for, Carter?" Jack O'Neill asked as he walked into Sam's lab.

Sam had been lost in thought and hadn't really heard Jack but when she saw him suddenly beside her out of the corner of her eye she jumped. "Sir?"

"You had the goofiest grin on your face." Jack said as he eyed her with a bit of amusement. "You don't normally daydream, Carter. So inquiring minds need to know, what were you thinking about that made you smile like that?"

Sam looked a bit puzzled. She hadn't been aware she'd been smiling. Then she realized she must have been smiling because of Janet and their pending date. She couldn't tell Jack that so there was only one way to get her friend and commanding officer to drop the subject, she launched into a technical explanation of her latest naquadah research.

Jack groaned, his eyes going crossed eyed as he shook his head. "Only you would make a face like that over science. I make faces like that over things that really matter."

"Such as, Sir?" Sam asked with a quizzical look and soft smile. 

"A good steak cooked perfectly rare, and an ice cold beer pulled fresh from the tap." Jack replied, his eyes taking on a dreamy look as he licked his lips. 

Sam rolled her eyes and grinned. "Are you hungry, Sir?"

"Yes." Jack answered. "Let’s go to O'Malley's."

"You get Teal'c and I'll get Daniel." Sam said easily as she began locking up and securing her work area.

Jack blinked in surprise. "Wow, you must be in a good mood. That was to easy."

"I could be more difficult if you'd like, Sir." Sam teased. "But that would cut into our dinner break."

"No, no." Jack replied as he hurried for the door. "You can be more difficult next time."

Sam knew that Jack was aware that she and Janet harbored feelings for one another, and as they made their way to O'Malley's for dinner she couldn't stop herself from wondering how he would react if he knew she and Janet were planning on following up on those feelings. The look on his face when she said it was Janet she cared about in that way and not him was a look Sam would never forget, but Jack O'Neill wasn't a petty man. He would be happy for her and Janet if he could be, wouldn't he? After all Sam was thrilled that Jack had decided to try and find a way to make things work with Laira, visiting the planet of Edora to see her whenever he could. So she really liked to think that if she could be honest with him about herself and Janet, he would be just as happy for her because he knew what a good person Janet was, and he would be able to see how happy Janet made her.   
Glancing around the table at all of her boys as they waited on their meals, Sam let herself think that they would all be happy for her and Janet. It might be a little awkward at first, there might need to be a little time for adjustment to the idea, but she knew Daniel would be supportive. He'd become more like a brother to her over the last five years than Mark had been in the last fifteen. He would be happy for her because he would understand what Janet meant to her. Janet was her Sha're. She would bring the universe to its knees to save Janet, to protect her and keep her safe. That thought startled Sam. It was the first time she'd truly acknowledged just how strong her feelings for the brilliant doctor were.

"Are you alright, Major Carter?" Teal'c asked from across the table.

"I'm fine, Teal'c. Why?" Sam replied as she turned her focus on him rather than her thoughts of Janet and the reactions of the other people in her life she cared most about. 

The big, surprisingly gentle, man titled his head a little and raised his right eyebrow ever so slightly. "Your facial expression suggests you might have something on your mind."

Before Sam could say anything, Jack cut in, "Don't ask, T. It's about science."

Teal'c's expression changed from one of concern to one of curiosity not that anyone but his companions would know that. "Have you had a breakthrough in your research, Major Carter?"

Jack groaned because Teal'c had opened a door to nerd talk but Sam just smiled a dazzling smile at her friend. The fact that he showed an interest in what she was doing meant a lot to her. "Something like that." Sam replied simply. "But it’s very early stages so not much to talk about. I'd rather hear about poker night. Walter said you cleaned house."

While Teal'c and Jack talked about Teal'c the card shark Sam wondered about her alien friend. What did the Jaffa think about same sex relationships? Anise/Freya had told her that the goa'uld had put the restrictions on same sex coupling because they needed humans to breed. Certainly, they'd done the same with the Jaffa? They needed the Jaffa to breed so they would always have disposable warriors and living incubators for their larval staged children. So wouldn't that mean the Jaffa had the same stigma against same sex relationships? Would Teal'c look at her and Janet differently if he knew? Would he no longer consider them worthy of his respect? Then again maybe she wasn't giving Teal'c enough credit. Anise/Freya had mentioned loving a female Jaffa. Teal’c had been in the room and from what she could remember he hadn’t had a negative reaction, then again, her mind and heart were on other matters at the time. But maybe he would be more understanding when it came to matters of the heart then she was giving him credit for. He was a man who spent his life loving two women after all. Teal'c loved Drey'auc but there was also something special between him and Shau'nac. Sam felt like he would understand, that her friend with the big heart would get the kind of connection she had with Janet, and he would be all for it. At least she hoped he would if she were ever able to tell him.

They might not have been able to tell their friends and colleagues about their pending relationship, but there was one person they simply couldn't hid it from, and she was the one Janet worried about most. A part of her believed that Cassandra would be thrilled with having her mom and her hero together. Sam was already a big part of their lives and Janet was hoping that if things worked out the way she wanted them to that she and Sam being a couple would give Cassie a little more security in her life. As wonderful as the image was of the three of them being a happy, though completely secret, family there was enough doubt in Janet's mind to make her terrified of telling Cassie. They still knew so little of what life was like on Hanka. Cassie talked about her family from time to time, which Janet encouraged because she didn't want Cassie to ever forget them, but she rarely if ever spoke of Hanka and what it was like. Nirrti hadn't ruled over Hanka the way other goa'uld ruled over their conquered and enslaved planets. She'd treated it like a lab and its inhabitants were merely test subjects. Knowing this made Janet wonder how Hanka's culture had differed, if it did differ at all, from other goa'uld worlds.

What if Cassie disapproved of Janet having a romantic relationship with Sam? She didn't want to risk doing something that would cause her to lose her daughter, but could she go back to pretending she could be happy with just a simple friendship with Sam? Janet decided not to let herself sink to far into the 'what ifs' until after her date with Sam. Who knew? Maybe the reality of romance with Samantha Carter wasn't as good as or compatible as the fantasy. Just because she was pretty damn sure she'd fallen in love with Sam, that didn't automatically mean they'd be good together. Janet was going to be as cautious as she could be not only for the sake of her own heart, but because her choices effected Cassie as well.

Unlike SG1, Janet hadn't had any downtime during the week, so work had kept her focused and busy. When she got home in the evenings Cassie took over where work had left off with her new 'I'm a teenager and you can't boss me' attitude that was wearing on Janet's last nerve rather quickly. As a result, she hadn't had the time to really think about or fret over her pending date with Sam. It wasn't until Friday afternoon when Sam poked her head into her office to let her know what the dress code for the evening was, that Janet started to freak out a bit. Sam had said “more than casual but nothing too fancy,”. They were taking things slow after all, “evening gowns and tailored suits are more of a fifth date kind of thing.”. Janet had smiled, her eyes lighting up like sunlight behind stained glass. She would very much like to see Sam in a tailored suit. After shaking off the mental images she'd been flooded with Janet realized nothing she had at home would do, so after work she went shopping. 

Deciding she wanted to show Sam a side of herself she hadn't seen yet Janet had been a little daring with her outfit. Her USAF uniform and mom jeans had been replaced with a short black skirt that fell a hand's length above her knees, a tight fitted red sweater, heels that would compensate for their high difference as long as Sam didn't wear a high heel, and a black leather jacket which Janet would slip on when Sam arrived. Standing in front of her mirror Janet bit her lip nervously as she looked herself over. Her hair was down, soft, and feathery in a way that made Sam smile every time she saw it that way. Her makeup was normally very clean and light both because of uniform regulations and because she just favored a more barley there look, but for this she'd been a little more bold, a little more defining with her make up. The woman standing in front of her mirror was no Air Force major, no doctor, no mother; she was a beautiful woman ready and willing to show Samantha Carter just how lucky she was.

"Wow. Mom, you look amazing." Cassie said from the doorway of Janet's bedroom.

"Cassie!" Janet squeaked, her body twitching in surprised as she turned to look at her daughter with wide eyes. "What are you doing home? I thought you were staying at Stacy's house tonight."

Cassie couldn't help but smirk. "I am. I forgot a couple of things I need." Crossing her arms over her chest she leaned against the doorframe in much the same way Janet did when she was making clear she wasn't letting Cassie get out of talking to her. "I thought you didn't have any big plans tonight. You said you might meet some friends for drinks or something, but you're so not dressed for drinks or something with just friends."

Janet was doing a fairly good imitation of a fish gasping for water in the open air.

Cassie laughed softly. "You don't need to spaz, Mom. I'm glad you're going out on a date. You need a personal life."

The sincerity in Cassie's voice snapped Janet out of her shock at being busted. Even if this date weren't with Sam, Janet would have kept it under Cassie's radar. She wouldn't have introduced someone into Cassie's life that she wasn't one hundred and fifty percent sure would be good for her. "I do?"

"Yeah." Cassie replied with a nod. "For a long time now, all your focus and energy has been on me and work, with very little time for yourself. I'm glad you're finally doing something for you."

"Thank you, sweetheart." Janet said with a bright smile and nearly watery eyes. Walking over to her daughter Janet hugged her and savored the tightness of the hug she got back. 

"Just do me a favor,” Cassie said with a smile as she pulled out of the embrace. “Tell this mystery date person they'd better be nice to you and respect you." Cassie’s smirk reminded Janet of Sam and that made her smile. "Cause if they hurt my mom, they'll have to deal with me, and I know some pretty scary people."

"Scary people?" Janet asked with amusement.

Cassie kissed her mother's cheek before nodding. "Yeap. I'd just tell Uncle Teal'c some asshat disrespected you and he'd take care of it."

"Cassandra!" Janet replied, her tone half scolding over the use of the word asshat and half amused at the idea of Teal'c defending her honor against Sam.

Cassie just gave her mother her most innocent smile and said, "Have fun, Mom."

Despite what most people thought, Sam did have a girly side. In fact, she could pull off girly quite well when she wanted too. Standing in front of her open closet in her lacey black panties and bra the question was how girly did she want to be? After throwing several items of clothing over to her bed Sam settled on a knee length black pleated skirt and a blue silk button down that she hoped made the blue in her eyes stand out. She knew how much Janet liked her eyes. Something told her to go with her strappy sandals over heels, something that sounded an awful lot like the noise Janet made in the back of her throat whenever she was teased about her height. She did what she could with her hair; keeping it soft because she had the distinct feeling Janet liked playing with her hair. There had been several times over the last year or so where Sam remembered coming back to consciousness with the feeling of Janet's fingers in her hair. It might have been more along the lines of she liked Janet playing with her hair rather than Janet liking to play with it, but either way she was going to make sure the option was there.

Sam couldn't remember the last time she'd felt so nervous. Planning the evening had been easy compared to driving over to Janet's house even though she'd done so hundreds of times before. She'd been wondering all week long what would make tonight different than all the other times they'd spent time together, and now Sam knew. It was the emotions behind what tonight meant. This was Sam taking the woman she'd fallen in love with out for what she hoped was the first evening of many. This was Sam spending time with someone she knew had fallen in love with her too. This was the key in the door to something so much more than just friendship. Would the key turn? Would the door open wide and let them step through together? Sam laughed at herself when she realized she felt less nervous, less terrified facing Apophis than she did pulling into Janet's driveway.

After taking a deep breath Sam got out of the car and walked up to Janet's door to knock. It wasn't an uncommon sight for Sam to be picking Janet up for a night out, so she wasn't worried about being seen. She would however wait until she was inside before giving Janet the pink daisy she'd brought her. When the door opened and Sam saw Janet standing there looking drop dead gorgeous her jaw dropped before she stammered out, "Holy Hannah."

That pleased Janet to no end. She smiled in a way Sam wouldn't have seen before, it was sultry and teasing, and then Janet replied, "See something you like Sammie?"

Sam nodded dumbly.

Janet laughed and invited Sam in. "So do I." She replied as she let her dark eyes roam over Sam. The skirt and fitted button down accented everything Janet liked about Sam's figure in just the right ways. Reaching up Janet fingered the collar of the blue silk shirt, letting her knuckle just barely graze the skin of Sam’s collarbone. "This color looks good on you, Sam."

"Thanks." Sam said with a soft blush, and a breathy hitch in her voice. She watched as Janet turn to grab a leather jacket and slip in on, and again her breath hitched. "I love the jacket."

"I hoped you would." Janet admitted as she watched the pupils of Sam’s eyes dilate slightly. 

That made the blush coloring Sam's cheeks a bit more intense. Ever since Sam had shown up on Janet’s doorstep to talk about Janet kissing her in the infirmary, they’d been flirting with one another a little more. It was always playful, and of course in private, and Sam savored every moment of it. This flirting was different, more intimate, and she was enjoying the newness of it a great deal. "Now that I know you have one, we'll have to put it to good use."

"Oh no." Janet said with a quick shake of her head, knowing immediately where Sam was going with this. "You are not getting me on a motorcycle."

Sam's eyes lit up and her smile broadened. "Challenge accepted."

"Sam." Janet warned. “I mean it.” 

Sam quickly held out the pink daisy and smiled that butter wouldn't melt in her mouth smile of hers. "Are you ready to go?"

Everything about Janet instantly softened at the simple offering. No one had given her a flower since Bobby Flanagan's sister told him to bring her a corsage on prom night, not even her ex-husband. Reaching out Janet took the offered daisy and instantly held it to her nose and smiled. "More than ready."

Sam drove them to Denver for dinner. If her meticulous research panned out, and the little French bistro she'd made reservations at not only gave them a good meal, but the much needed privacy they both craved for the evening, then the hour and fifteen minute drive would be worth it. The drive was pleasant once the awkwardness of being a first date settled into the background. Janet tried to get Sam to tell her what she'd planned for the evening, but Sam refused and actually had a bit of fun keeping her date in suspense. Though that was far harder to do when Janet looked over at her with those big brown eyes and a pouty lip.

"Oh no." Sam warned after catching Janet giving her that look again. "Janet, that's not fair. Quit it."

"What's not fair, Sammie?" Janet practically hummed while fighting hard against a smirk.

"You looking at me like that." Sam replied. Sam normally hated being called Sammie. No one had called her that since her mother died. But there was just something about the way Janet said it, no more like purred it, that made her quiver inside like blue jello.

"Looking at you like what?" Janet asked sweetly, a picture of innocence and purity as she sat in the passenger seat and batted her eyes at Sam.

Sam just shook her head after glancing over at the brunette beside her. She could tell Janet was trying to hold back a look of amusement and it made her laugh. "You're going to end up a handful, aren't you?"

Janet couldn't help but laugh. "Guess you'll just have to wait and find out."

Everything about the setup of the restaurant was aimed at giving each table as much privacy as possible without actually enclosing each table in a cubical of some sort. The lighting, the spacing, the size of the tables, all worked together to allow the couples as much intimacy as possible in a public setting. When they were shown to their table there was another pink daisy waiting for Janet, and the smile she shot Sam as she picked it up was Sam's new favorite thing to see. Janet held the flower under her nose again and inhaled. The scent of daisies was quickly becoming associated with Sam in her mind and she liked that.

Sam watched Janet for a moment and smiled. Reaching out she took Janet's hand and held it lightly as she said, "I'm not sure I've ever seen such a peaceful expression on your face before."

"I guess between work and raising a teenager I haven't had to many purely peaceful moments in a good long while." Janet replied softly.

Sam promised herself she'd do what she could to see that look on Janet's face again. "I'll have to make sure you have a few more from now on."

Janet smiled. She turned the hand Sam had taken so they were palm to palm and began to run her thumb over the webbing between Sam's index finger and thumb. There was a scar there that she'd always wondered about. As Sam's doctor she knew Sam had several scars that predated her assignment at the SGC and she wanted to ask about each and every one of them, preferably while running her hands over Sam's naked body and following each question with her lips pressed to warm skin.

"You're blushing." Sam said as soon as she caught the faint coloring of Janet's cheeks.

"Am I?" Janet replied, a slight squeak in her voice.

Sam nodded and grinned. "What were you thinking about?"

Much to Janet's relief the waiter came with the bottle of wine they'd ordered. As soon as he was gone, she took a sip from her glass and smiled, "This is very good."

"You're not going to tell me, are you?" Sam asked, still grinning. Janet shook her head in a way that made her hair dance and Sam's grin turned into a full-blown smile.

"What?" Janet asked when she took in the change of Sam's expression.

Now Sam was the one with a soft squeak in her voice, "Nothing."

Janet laughed. "I'll tell you mine if you tell me yours."

The two just stared into each other's eyes for a long moment before Sam nodded her agreement to that. "You first."

Reaching for Sam's hand again she caressed the scar with her thumb. "How did you get this scar?"

That wasn't what Sam was expecting. It took her a moment to process what Janet said and then to remember she had a scar there. Smiling she answered, "Side arm training. When Dad first started teaching me, I was about Cassie’s age I think, I kept holding the damn thing wrong."

"Slide bite." Janet said with a nod of understanding. 

"My hand scar isn't what made you blush." Sam said softly, enjoying the gentle caress of Janet’s thumb over her skin. 

"No, it didn't." Janet admitted. Sam continued to look at her expectedly, so after biting her lip for a moment Janet gave in. "You have other scars I want to ask about.” She raised Sam’s hand to her lips and pressed a kiss to the faded scar she’d been caressing with her thumb. She looked up to meet Sam’s eyes and smirked, “And a certain way I want to ask about them."

It took a few moments but when Sam understood what Janet meant she blushed, and smiled in a way that told Janet she wouldn’t object to Janet’s methods of questioning.

"You're turn." Janet said. She wasn't sure if she wanted to change the subject to help Sam stop blushing or to make her blush a bit more. She liked the added color to Sam's otherwise pale complexion, and she liked it even more that she was the one causing it.

Sam could feel the heat on her cheeks get a little worse as she said, "Your hair, it did this thing that reminded me of the first time I thought you were really attractive in a less than innocent way."

That certainly caught Janet's attention. Raising an inquisitive eyebrow, she smiled at Sam and said, "Oh now this I have to hear."

"It was during the Hathor invasion." Sam began to explain. "During the firefight in the Gate room against the airmen infected by Hathor.” Sam reached out to twirl a strand of Janet’s hair around her finger. “When you turned to return fire, your hair did this really sexy flowy thing, and you got this really sexy little smirk on your face as you returned fire. You in that moment, you took my breath away."

"So, you think solider Janet is sexy?" Janet asked with a smirk very similar to the one Sam had described.

"In that moment, yes." Sam said and then grinned as she teased, "Before that moment I thought you looked absolutely adorable in fatigues." There was something about the way Sam said adorable that made Janet stick her tongue out at her, which made Sam laugh.

Dinner gave them their first real chance to venture beyond the borders of how they already knew each other. They talked and teased and flirted not as two close friends out for the evening but as two women deeply attracted to one another who both hoped for so much more. As far as they were concerned the first half of the date was a success. They'd gotten to know each other in a more intimate way and they both felt it was a really good start to discovering more.

After dinner Sam drove them out to a private airfield where she'd arranged to use one of the small empty hangers. The look of confusion on Janet's face as they pulled up in front of the building made Sam smirk. She really wanted them to have the space to be alone as they took these first steps into a romantic relationship, and this had seemed like the perfect way to do that. They could enjoy each other’s company, explore and test the new parameters of this wonderous thing happening between them, and not have to worry about prying eyes or accidently being spotted doing something more than a friendly interaction. 

"Sam?" Janet said as Sam unlocked the hanger bay door. "I thought we were going to see a movie."

"We are." Sam said as she pushed the door open and waved a hand for Janet to step inside.

Janet's eyes went wide as she took in the space. The hanger bay had been turned into a home theater of sorts. There was a movie screen against the back wall, a refreshment area with popcorn, candy, and soda, and what looked like a collection of sofas made from the front and back ends of classic cars. "Sam?"

"I know this guy from the auto parts store." Sam explained as she smiled at Janet and tugged her towards the refreshment area after sliding the door closed behind them. "He talked about putting this place together and I gave him a couple heads up about finding what he needed for the seating and some of the other odds and ends. When he was finished, he said I could use it whenever I wanted, as a way of thanking me for my help. I hadn't taken him up on it until now."

"This is pretty impressive." Janet said as she continued taking it all in. It was sort of like a 50s/60s drive-in only inside which gave it a kind of intimate feel and allowed for it to be used year-round.

The fact that Janet approved made Sam light up. She’d had her doubts, this was a bit more her scene than Janet’s, but the smile on Janet’s face as she took it all in said that she’d made a good choice. Before reaching for the popcorn to put into the popper Sam reached for the third pink daisy of the evening. She held it out to Janet and smiled a dopy smile that made Janet glow happily before leaning in close to kiss Sam's cheek.

Once the popcorn was ready and they had their chosen candies and sodas of preference, Sam set up the movie and they got comfortable. Not many people knew that Janet had a soft spot for classic B-rated horror films, but Sam did. Since the old films were a little over an hour each Sam had picked two, 1935's Bride of Frankenstein and 1931's Dracula. They started the first movie sitting side by side but with a bit of comfortable distance between them, and by the end of the second Janet was cuddle into Sam's side with Sam's arm around her. It felt so natural, so right. It felt as if they'd been made specially to fit together the way they did.

It was late when Sam finally took Janet home. After unlocking her front door Janet stepped inside and made sure Sam followed. As much as she wanted to ask Sam to stay the night, they'd agreed on taking things slow. Once the door closed them off from the outside world Janet did turn to face Sam and she did pull the tall blonde down and into a kiss. The kiss was tentative and careful at first but once they were both sure this was what they wanted they let their want and desire heat things up. It was a kiss full of promise and hope. It was the first kiss of many that would help them get through the tough times ahead of them.

"Goodnight Janet." Sam said softly as she forced herself to pull out of Janet's arms.

Janet was beaming as she looked up into Sam’s shining face. "Night Sam."


	3. Chapter 3

It had been a hectic and emotional few weeks. It started with Sam going on a mission with her father where she wondered if he could tell there was something different about her, but it was either too early for Jacob to see that Sam was happy in a way she hadn't been before, or he was to distracted helping SG1 fight Apophis and Replicators to notice. Of course, between blowing up a sun and rescuing a brain washed Teal'c, Sam didn't really have time to explain things to Jacob even if he had noticed. Hell, Sam wasn't even sure she was going to explain things. Selmak might have helped Jacob Carter grow and learn to be more open minded, but Sam highly doubted the former Air Force general would be all happy go lucky to find out his daughter was dating a woman. Sam tried not to worry too much about telling her father. She rarely saw him now that he was a Tok'ra, so she figured she had time to work out the best way to explain things to him the next time he was on Earth and their lives weren’t on the line. The one person she did worry about telling, and felt really needed to know, was Cassie. She and Janet both agreed that telling her needed to happen sooner rather than later. 

With Teal'c on medical leave due to brainwashing, SG1 had been put on stand-down. Normally Sam hated any kind of downtime, but now that she had something worthwhile to spend that time on, she was ok with having some much needed time off. She and Janet were worried about Teal'c, afraid they might not ever have their friend back the way he was meant to be, and it was hard for them to leave base at the end of the night because they wanted to do something, anything for him. But there really wasn't anything they could do just then. Janet saw to his medical needs but most of his care had been handed over to MacKenzie. They had sent for Bra'tac but until he arrived there wasn't much any of them could do. Janet had helped distract Sam by surprising her with tickets to a car and motorcycle show in Denver. It had been their second official date and it had gone just as well as their first, despite the stress and worry they’d left behind, underneath the mountain. Allowing themselves to forget everything SGC for a day had been worth it, because not only were they both a bit more relaxed, but now Sam had a picture of Janet in tight black jeans, a soft pink tank top, and a leather jacket leaning against a very sexy Harley Davidson. It was now Sam's most favorite picture ever.

Now that they were dating, it changed the way they spent their time together even when they weren't on an official date. At home when Sam was over at Janet's and Cassie wasn’t home, or when they were totally alone at Sam’s place, they were more relaxed about how close they sat or stood together; they were more at ease with touching each other. The one-sided tension they’d both felt while trying to keep their thoughts, emotions, and actions in check around one another was gone. Slowly, inch-by-inch, this thing between them grew, becoming less experimental and far more real. Though they did reign themselves in when Cassie was around, until they were ready to talk to her about it, they tried to act as they had before they’d become a couple. They did it on base, so it wasn’t hard to do, they just each hated doing it more and more. 

When Bra'tac finally showed up and shocked the hell out of everyone by ripping Junior II (Teal’c had given the original Junior to his son to save the boy’s life years ago) out of Teal'c's pouch things got pretty tense. Sam watched as Janet went toe to toe with Bra'tac and Hammond and felt both concern for Janet’s career, and eminence pride in the strong, stubborn, brave woman she loved. Letting Teal'c flirt with death didn't set well with Sam any more than it did with Janet. Teal’c was more than just her friend, he was her brother, and seeing him suffering was painful for her. She knew Janet felt the same way but for Janet there was also the fact that what they were doing went against everything she believed in as a doctor, First Do No Harm. After the General had ordered Janet to stand down Sam followed Janet to her office. When she walked in, she’d heard her girlfriend quietly and angrily reciting, " I swear to fulfill, to the best of my ability and judgment, this covenant. I will respect the hard-won scientific gains of those physicians in whose steps I walk, and gladly share such knowledge as is mine with those who are to follow. I will apply, for the benefit of the sick, all measures that are required, avoiding those twin traps of overtreatment and therapeutic nihilism.” 

Sam closed the door behind her. She knew that Janet knew, that she was there and yet Janet continued. “I will remember that there is art to medicine as well as science, and that warmth, sympathy, and understanding may outweigh the surgeon's knife or the chemist's drug. I will not be ashamed to say, "I know not," nor will I fail to call in my colleagues when the skills of another are needed for a patient's recovery.” Janet’s voice broke a little, the tight grip she had on the back of her chair tightened more, her knuckles going white. The tension in her jaw made Janet’s words sounds almost like an angry growl. Sam walked over and placed her hand on Janet’s shoulder, squeezing tightly. 

“I will respect the privacy of my patients, for their problems are not disclosed to me that the world may know. Most especially must I tread with care in matters of life and death.” Janet’s voice cracks again. “If it is given me to save a life, all thanks. But it may also be within my power to take a life; this awesome responsibility must be faced with great humbleness and awareness of my own frailty.” A friendly hand of support no longer felt like it was enough, and Sam debated doing more. Regulations be damned, Janet was hurting, they both were hurting, and all Sam wanted to do was take her girlfriend into her arms so they could offer each other strength and reassurance. 

“Above all, I must not play at God. I will remember that I do not treat a fever chart, a cancerous growth, but a sick human being, whose illness may affect the person's family and economic stability. My responsibility includes these related problems if I am to care adequately for the sick. I will prevent disease whenever I can, for prevention is preferable to cure. I will protect the environment which sustains us, in the knowledge that the continuing health of ourselves and our societies is dependent on a healthy planet. I will remember that I remain a member of society, with special obligations to all my fellow human beings, those sound of mind and body as well as the infirm.” Screw it, Sam couldn’t take it and before she could stop herself she was pulling Janet into her arms and holding her, causing the last of her vow to be muffled but she’d still heard it and the emotion behind the words. “If I do not violate this oath, may I enjoy life and art, respected while I live and remembered with affection thereafter. May I always act so as to preserve the finest traditions of my calling and may I long experience the joy of healing those who seek my help."

Janet had been trying to remind herself that there were times in which she was allowed to let something alterative happen to help her patient, and that if it was for her patient’s best chance at living, she had an obligation to step aside allow someone else to help in ways she could not, but the part of her that believed in first do no harm wasn't making it easy. She had to find a way to compromise, and in the end it had been Bra'tac's desire to save Teal'c's soul combined with Janet's desire to save his life that led to them getting their Teal'c back alive and well. Janet had earned a great deal of respect and admiration from their Jaffa friends, but there would be tension between her and Master Bra’tac for a while. 

It took some pleading on Sam’s part, but she eventually got Janet to agree to head home once they were sure Teal’c was in good condition and improving by the minute. Janet was exhausted both physically and mentally, and all Sam wanted was to take care of her until she felt better. No one questioned Sam taking Janet home, they did that for each other a lot. One would work herself beyond reason and the other would take it upon themselves to see the other got home safely to rest and recover. Though admittedly it was normally Janet forcing Sam home, but it was known to happen the other way around from time to time. Once they arrived at Janet’s, Sam led her upstairs to her room, drew her a hot bubble bath and then gently ordered her to soak while she handled dinner. Janet smiled gratefully and disappeared into the lavender scented warmth of her bathroom. Sam ordered from their favorite Italian take out place, chilled a bottle of their favorite wine, and put one of Janet’s favorite guilty pleasures into the DVD player. When Janet joined her downstairs, they settled on the sofa and ate quietly. When she put the movie on it simply became background noise as she’s pulled Janet’s feet into her lap and began messaging away whatever physical tension the bath hadn’t been able to relieve. 

"You really impressed Master Bra'tac." Sam said as she began kneading Janet's left foot.

Janet, who was laying across the sofa with her head on a pillow, her eyes closed, and her legs draped across Sam’s lap, snorted. "Sure I did."

"You did." Sam insisted, a proud smile lighting up her face. "I overheard him talking to Teal'c before we left. You fought to save Teal'c's life; you stood your ground against him and Hammond to protect Teal’c. Bra'tac found that remarkable, admirable, and worthy of his respect."

Janet didn't bother hiding the surprise on her face as she lifted her head and opened her eyes to look at Sam. She wondered if the Jaffa master would think the same if things had gone the other way. She knew she would be struggling even more than she already was if things had been different. Thankfully, everything had worked out, Teal'c had survived and the brainwashing undone, but if Teal'c had died, if they'd lost him because she'd waited too long to act, she would never have forgiven herself.

Sam smirked as she remembered the rest of Teal'c and Bra'tac's conversation. "I think Bra'tac's admiration might include a little adoration."

Brown eyes widened a little. "What do you mean?"

"I heard him ask Teal'c if you had a bonded mate." Sam said with a huge grin. "Then there was a long pause, I think they might have been having one of those eyebrow conversations they have, and then Bra'tac laughed and said Teal'c was right but if he were fifty years younger…"

Janet groaned and rolled her eyes, letting her head fall back onto the sofa pillow.

"I wonder why he asked if you had a bonded mate rather than just a mate?" Sam continued as she switched to Janet's other foot. She was enjoying the reactions she was getting from the smaller woman. Normally she was the one who seemed to draw the attention of the male aliens they came across; it was nice to see someone else get the attention for once.

"Maybe without some kind of formal bond he could have challenged you for my affection." Janet was smirking now. 

"Me?" Sam responded with slightly wide eyes.

"Well," Janet purred as she shifted so she was leaning on her elbows a little more so she could look at Sam better when she opened her eyes this time. "You are the one I'm currently dating." Brown eyes looked right into blue as Janet asked, "Would you fight for me, Sammie?"

"Yes." Sam said without hesitation. "For the whole five minutes it would take for Bra'tac to pick me up and throw me across the room."

There was such certainty in Sam's eyes that Janet couldn't help herself. She sat up completely, pulling her foot from Sam's grasp, and then closed the distance between them. She pressed closer to Sam's body and easily threw her leg over Sam's lap, so she was straddling her. The look of shock on Sam's face as she stretched out her spine, her face hovering over Sam's as she pushed her back against the sofa was priceless. Reaching out Janet sank her fingers into Sam's hair until the tips of her fingers brushed the nape of Sam's neck, then she locked her fingers into a tight but gentle grip on the short golden locks. Their eyes locked and Janet waited.

Seconds felt like hours as Sam tried to process what was happening. They'd kissed before but nothing quite so intimately aggressive. Admitting their attraction had opened the gates to their desires. Sam had seen passion and longing in Janet's eyes before, and she was fairly certain Janet had seen that passion and longing mirrored in her own. But they were taking things slow and letting this thing between them blossom and grow naturally. Logically Sam knew taking the next step would be happening sooner rather later, but she was still a little caught off guard. While Sam's brain was processing, her body was moving on instinct. Her hands went to Janet's hips first. Then her right hand slid under Janet's shirt to press against the warm skin at the small of her back. Craning her neck up Sam easily captured Janet's waiting lips in a kiss.

A week later, on a Saturday night with the house once again to themselves, the two were in that same position. Janet was straddling Sam's lap, pinning her against the sofa. Her hands had a tight grip on Sam's hair. One of Sam's hands rested on the small of her back under her shirt while the other ventured a little further up her spine. The kiss was hungry and full of passion, but they had yet to give in and go further. The week before, the physical and mental fatigue they had both suffered due to Teal’c’s ordeal had put a stop to them taking things up to Janet’s bed. Tonight, while they both wanted nothing more than to go upstairs, there was still something in their way. Something that was preventing them from crossing that final line into the kind of relationship they both longed for, something strong and stable in both the emotional and the physical. Their physical desires begged them to jump over that line already, so it was clearly something emotional that was holding them back. 

Janet's shirt rode up a little more as Sam's hand continued its slow exploration of Janet's back. The smooth warm skin Sam uncovered felt like silk under her scared and callused hands, and Sam found it fascinating. Janet was pressed to tightly against her own body for Sam to slide her hand around to caress her girlfriend's abdomen to see if it felt just as silky, but she was able to trail her hand up Janet's side, stopping when her fingers brushed against the edge of Janet's bra.

The gentle brush of Sam's fingers made Janet moan aloud and swear internally because Sam didn't go further. Janet tugged at Sam's hair in both pleasure and disappointment, which made Sam's hand head back towards the edge of bra. Both women were so focused on what they were doing with each other that they didn't hear the front door open and close. Thankfully, they did hear Cassie call out, "Mom? Are you home?"

Janet moved away from Sam so fast one might think she was dodging staff weapon fire. "Cassie.” She tried not to sound as out of breath as she really was. “You're home early, sweetheart."

Cassie walked into the living room and then stood there looking at the two women on the sofa. They were both breathless, their skin was flushed, Sam's hair was a mess, and her Mom was tugging at her shirt, pulling it back down and into place. It was pretty clear to the teen that her mother and Sam had been making out, and it was hard for her not to smirk. "Stacy wasn't feeling well so Kenya and I just called it a night."

Janet did her best not to act as caught off guard as she felt while Sam was hopelessly tangled in her panic like a deer in headlights. "Have you eaten?" Janet asked her daughter as Cassie continued to stare at them. "There are leftovers in the kitchen."

Moving closer to the pair, who were now sitting as far apart on the sofa as they could get, Cassie looked at Sam for a long moment before looking over at her mom. "So, Sam’s the person you’ve been dating."

Janet stared at her daughter while doing a fairly good imitation of a gasping fish.

"Why didn't you just tell me you and Sam were finally together?" Cassie asked taking her mother's response as a yes.

Janet looked over at Sam who was looking back at her. They had both been worried about Cassie's reaction and had been putting off talking to her. Sam was the one who turned to look at Cassie and said, "To be honest kid, we were worried you wouldn't be ok with it."

Cassie sat down on the coffee table in front of them with a confused look on her face. "Why wouldn't I be ok with it?"

"Well, because we're both women." Sam replied.

"What's that got to do with anything?" Cassie asked.

Again, Janet and Sam exchanged looks. Had they been afraid for no reason? Turning back towards Cassie it was Janet who spoke this time. "Romantic relationships between two people of the same gender are still considered taboo in most cultures on Earth."

"Well that's just dumb." Cassie said easily.

Sam was surprised by Cassie's response and it showed on her face. Maybe it had to do with how things were on Cassie's home world, or maybe it was because Cassie was young and still open minded about things, or maybe it was a bit of both. Whatever it was it was a huge relief that Cassie seemed to be ok with her and Janet being a couple. "Yeah, it is." Then she blinked because something Cassie said had finally landed in her thoughts. “Wait, what do you mean finally together?” 

Cassie smiled, a bright and playfully happy smile. “You should have been together ages ago but your both so stubborn and air forcey. I wasn’t sure it would ever happen.” 

"So, wait, you knew about us? And you're ok with me and Sam being more than friends?" Janet asked. She was feeling a mix of surprise and relief, and a little guilt for not giving Cassie the benefit of the doubt.

"Of course I knew, you’re my moms, and I want you both to be happy." Cassie said honestly. "You being happy together, is a bonus."

Both women instantly relaxed. Their faces lit up and they smiled as Sam reached out and pulled Cassie over to the sofa to sit between them. They wrapped the girl in a double hug that made the teenager groan through the smile on her face expressed just how happy she was that the two most important people in her life were finally together like they should be. Even alien kids from other planets wanted their parents together and happy so they could all be a family together. 

Now that Cassie knew the truth, they both felt things could finally move forward again. The final roadblock had been moved out of their way; a weight lifted from their shoulders. Privately they could finally become what they longed to be, a couple in every sense of the word, and a family. But they could only have that in the privacy of their home. 

"Cass," Janet said after they'd let the girl go. "Honey, you can't tell anyone about me and Sam."

"The U.S. military has this rule," Sam continued. "It keeps us from disclosing our relationship. If people were to find out your Mom and I could face charges which could lead to us being discharged, meaning we'd lose our jobs."

"Ok, but that's crap." Cassie said with a frown.

"It is." Janet agreed. "But for now, it's the way things are."

"I won't say anything." Cassie promised. "But what about the guys? You don't think they'll notice?"

"As long as we don't give them any hard evidence that we're breaking code of conduct they can think whatever they want, they can't ask us outright and we can't tell them." Sam explained.

"And they can't actively investigate or harass us." Janet added. "Not that our boys would, but there are some out there who might."

Sam nodded. "There are some people out there who would use Janet and me against the SGC."

Cassie shook her head. "Asshats."

"Cassandra." Janet scolded.

"What?" Cassie replied.

Janet gave her girl a hard glare. "Stop using that word. Where did you even learn that word?"

Cassie grinned. "Uncle Jack."

“Of course.” Janet groaned and rolled her eyes as she made a mental note to have a chat with O’Neill about what he was teaching her daughter. 

Sam laughed which earned her a soft glare from Janet, so she quickly stifled her amusement. 

Cassie grabbed the leftovers from the kitchen and spent the rest of the evening with Janet and Sam on the sofa. Cassie had questions and they did their best to answer them for her. She asked, when did they know their feelings had changed? And, how did they know they'd changed? And, where were they planning on taking things now? When Cassie had the answers she was looking for, she told them she was happy for them, reassuring them that she was great with all of this, and that they were good for each other. Then she warned Sam about hurting her mom. She loved Sam, she owed Sam her life, but when she needed a home, a family, a parent, someone to love her and take care of her, it was Janet who stepped up and took her in.

After Cassie went to bed Janet and Sam sat cuddled on the sofa in silence. They were both lost in their own thoughts and emotions as they sorted through the evening. Something had changed during their talk with Cassie, and Janet was pretty sure that she now understood what had been keeping her from taking the next step with Sam. Now that Cassie knew about them and Janet knew Cassie was ok with it, there was no longer anything stopping her. Shifting so she could look up at Sam, Janet bit her lip and then said, "Sam."

"Hmm?" Sam replied as she pulled herself out of her own head to look down into Janet's big brown eyes.

"Cassie knows." Janet said simply.

Sam smiled a happy relaxed smile. "She does."

"Sam?" Janet repeated.

"Hmm?" Sam replied again.

Her heart began to race as the next set of words formed in her mind. Reaching up, Janet caressed Sam's cheek as she said, "Don't go." Her hand slid along Sam's jaw, brushed past her earlobe, and curled around her neck. Her fingers began lightly scratching at the hair at the nape of Sam's neck. "Stay the night, Sam."

Sam was surprised by Janet's invitation. They hadn't actually talking about sleeping together; it was just assumed that they would when the time was right. It seemed the time was finally right. "Are you sure, Janet?"

"I wouldn't have asked if I weren't." Janet pointed out.

Sam smiled. She unwrapped her arms from around Janet so she could capture her face and pull her into a kiss. When the pair broke apart Sam's smile was even brighter. "I'd love to stay."

Janet leaned in too kiss Sam again. This was more than just a promise of good things to come; it was the start of those good things actually happening. When the kiss came to an end Janet stood up and then reached for Sam's hand. The taller woman stood easily, and Janet couldn't help but smile as Sam followed as she led them up to her bedroom.

She'd been in Janet's room before but suddenly it felt like a foreign land to Sam. They worked in so much cold, drab grey, day in and day out, it wasn't surprising that Janet's room was full of warmth and color. Janet liked pink. Not the little girl, bright and bubbly kind of pink, but the warm dark pinks and light reds you'd find in nature. Hence the pink daisies that had become kind of a thing between them. The Monday following their first date Sam had hidden a pink daisy in Janet's locker, and after their second she'd stopped on her way to work to put one on the dash of Janet's car.

The walls of Janet's room weren't the same pink as the daisies but were the same shade of pink as the cherry blossoms that Janet used as ascent décor near her window. The picture frames and mirrors were black, which went with the dark almost black stems the little flowers bloomed from. The bedding was a mix of white and a lighter shade of the warm pink on the walls. The bed, Sam realized for the first time, was large, much bigger than a woman of Janet's size needed to be comfortable. Sam suddenly found herself swallowing against a dry throat as the soft click of Janet locking the door ricocheted off the walls like a gunshot. For a moment Sam wondered why Janet would lock the door and then she remembered there was a teenager with boundary issues in the house. Janet was always complaining about Cassie walking in on her while she was dressing.

"Are you alright Sam?" Janet asked as she wrapped her arms around Sam from behind. She pressed her face into Sam's back and closed her eyes as she filled her lungs with Sam's unique scent. "You're trembling."

Sam Carter faced down the most vile, the most evil space monsters one could imagine on a daily basis, and yet this tiny woman with eyes like chocolate and a smile like the sun made her quake in her boots. "I'm fine, Janet." Sam said as she turned in her soon to be lover's arms. "I guess I'm just a little nervous is all."

Janet nodded her understanding. Sam wasn't the only one full of nervous anticipation. Leaning up she kissed Sam to show her once again that this was what she wanted. Then she walked over to her bed and sat down. She waited until Sam's eyes were on her and then moved so she was in the middle of the mattress, her back up against the headboard.

Sam licked her lips. Janet was still completely dressed but the way she was looking at Sam was the sexiest thing Sam had ever seen. She crossed the room in several long strides and then sat on the edge of Janet's bed. Those dark pools of molten chocolate never left her as Sam swallowed nervously before shifting so she was beside Janet. She leaned in to kiss her again, one arm going across Janet's body to support her weight as she pressed forward. Janet's hands were in her hair, tugging, scratching, and suddenly Sam realized her clothes hung heavily on her body and she wanted them off. She wanted to feel those hands, those nails, on every inch of her skin.

It was as if Janet could sense Sam's thoughts. Pulling her hands from Sam's hair she let them fall to the taller woman's shoulders so she could push her body away from her own just enough to allow her access to the buttons on Sam's shirt. Hands that were normally steady enough to perform complicated delicate surgery trembled as Janet tried to focus on getting Sam's shirt open while maintaining their kiss. She'd gotten three undone when Sam suddenly moved to her neck. A test nip just under and behind her earlobe shorted out Janet’s higher brain functions and suddenly undoing a button seemed impossibly hard.

Hearing what sounded like a frustrated growl made Sam stop and pull away from Janet to look at her. The expression on Janet's face made her laugh. "Dexterity can be a hard thing to master sometimes."

"Shut up and take your damn shirt off." Janet grunted.

That just made Sam laugh harder as she finished off the remaining buttons on her shirt and then let it fall from her shoulders. "Better?"

Janet had seen Sam naked hundreds of times, but this was so very different. She wasn't looking at Sam through the eyes of a doctor. She was looking at her as someone who wanted to touch, kiss, and taste every inch of her body. Janet wanted to know every rough patch, every curve, every bump, blemish, and angle that there was to know. She wanted to know how Sam would react to her intimate touches and kisses, what her lover liked and didn’t like. Reaching out she let her hands ghost over Sam's abdomen and nodded. "Much."

Reaching out to touch her had made Janet sit up a little and Sam took the opportunity to pull Janet's shirt up and over her head before dropping it to the floor. Janet was fit and tone but not in the same hard way Sam was. Sam was tall and slender, her muscle definition solid, and sculpted. Janet’s body was totally different. Letting her fingers run down Janet's midriff Sam could feel the firmness of her abs and could tell there was power and strength under the softness. She let her hands roam over Janet’s hips, down her thigh, and then back up her body towards her breasts. There was a suppleness to Janet that Sam simply didn’t have and she found it break taking. Trailing her fingers along the bottom of Janet's bra, Sam bit her lip as she followed the material up Janet’s side, over her shoulder and then along the bra strap. Right where the strap met lace Sam felt the slightest change in Janet's skin. Intrigued she pushed the strap down from Janet's shoulder and moved the material of the cup to get a better look at why that patch of skin felt rougher.

"Hathor." Janet said in a husker voice than she'd ever used with Sam before.

The firefight in the Gate room, the hair toss, Janet with the assault rifle, Sam remembered. Leaning down Sam pressed her lips to the spot where Janet had been shot.

As Sam kissed her scar, almost reverently Janet noted, she made quick work of ridding herself of her bra all together. Then she let her hands once again get lost in Sam's hair. Closing her eyes Janet tried to focus completely on the feeling of the gentle caress of Sam's hand over her now bare breast, but Janet had a sudden moment of insecurity and found herself oddly grateful that she was on her back because it meant her boobs would look good. Not that she didn't look damn good for a woman her age, but it was sometimes hard to keep the insecurities at bay with a new lover, especially one as important to her as Sam. 

Sam shivered when Janet gently raked her nails up her back. She wouldn't mind at all if Janet did that a little harder, but she didn't say anything. There would be plenty of time for them to learn about each other. Sam focused on the moment and reaching out to run her fingers over Janet's collarbone and then down between her exposed breasts. The look on Janet's face told her she liked it and that she was more than likely taking it the contrasting feel of her own soft skin and the calluses on Sam's fingers. Sam couldn't help but smile. The way Janet was biting her lip was to freaking adorable.

Janet caught the smile and just had to ask, "What?"

Sam gave her lover a megawatt smile that made her blue eyes sparkle. "You're really stinkin' cute."

Dark eyes went wide. Janet wasn't sure if she wanted to laugh or to smack Sam. "You have me half naked and you're thinking cute?"

Before Sam could respond, Janet was showing her lover just how strong and agile she was as she pulled Sam in for a heated kiss before flipping them. With Sam now on her back, Janet threw her leg over Sam's body, straddling her hips. She let Sam have a nice long look and was about to lean down to kiss the blonde when something in Sam's eyes caught her attention. "What are you doing?"

Sam blushed.

"Samantha." Janet said as she put her hands on her hips.

Sam giggled. "Calculating the circumference, area, and volume of your breasts."

Again, dark eyes went wide. This time Janet laughed. "You are such a goofball sometimes."

Leaning down Janet kissed Sam. Her hands went into Sam's hair while Sam's roamed over her bare back, and down to her ass. When Sam squeezed her ass she tugged on Sam's hair and they both moaned. After several minutes Janet moved her kisses to Sam's neck, along her collarbone, and once rid of her own bra down to Sam's breasts. She discovered Sam was ticklish on her side just below the swell of her breasts and filed that away for later. She moved down Sam's body until she was between Sam's long legs. As she undid Sam's jeans she thought about Sam on her motorcycle and about how strong her legs had to be to keep her on the dangerous machine. Janet bit her lip again, rested her forehead against Sam’s thigh for a moment, and then looked up and into Sam’s eyes. "Lift your hips, Sam."

Sam did and when Janet peeled the denim past Sam's thighs the smell of Sam's arousal triggered something in her and she couldn't get the damn jeans off fast enough, nearly falling off the bed as she tugged them off Sam. The scent wasn't really something Janet could describe in words other than perfectly Sam.

Not to be outdone, Sam sat up once her jeans were off and as soon as she was able to get her hands on Janet's hips she pulled her petite lover closer. She undid the button and zipper on Janet's jeans and daringly let her hand slip inside for a quick brush of fingers against silk and lace before pulling it back. Janet shuddered, a soft moan on her lips and then there was an urgent and slightly awkward wrestling match to get her jeans off as well.

Janet found herself on her back again. This time it was Sam making her way down Janet's body, caressing and kissing until she was just where she needed to be. After taking care of the last remaining piece of clothing on Janet's body Sam gently pushed her legs open. Her head dipped down while one arm circled around one of Janet's thighs, her other hand reached up to find Janet's, lacing their fingers together.

It wouldn't be the only time their fingers laced and locked together like that. Later, as Janet made her way back up Sam's body, she would slid her hand along Sam's arm until their fingers locked, their grips tight as she pressed against Sam, who raised her hips to press back. When she had Sam on her stomach, she'd run her hands over the curve of Sam's waist and up her back, over her shoulders and up her arms which were over Sam's head. The palm of her hand pressed against the back of Sam's, their fingers locked, and Janet closed her eyes as she felt the warm of Sam's back against her breasts. When she finally gave into sleep she was lying on Sam's chest, her head tucked under Sam's chin, her arm draped over Sam, their fingers laced and locked together in a tight hold that would last the rest of the night.


	4. Chapter 4

Things had been both insanely busy and rather humdrum around Stargate Command. Or at least it was compared to what passed for normal at the SGC. Off world missions had gone surprisingly well for the most part. There had only been small hiccups with some of the other teams, none of the world ending hiccups that SG1 normally brought with them. Pre and post mission medical exams kept Janet busy and the occasional team member falling off a small bluff and breaking his leg or discovering she was dangerously allergic to alien bees kept things from getting boring. While Janet's workload kept her busy, she was still able to go home at the end of her shifts. Sam's kept her either on base in her lab or off world. Being off world with SG1 wasn't something Sam had complete control over since the final call was Hammond's, but the amount of time she spent in her lab was on her and lately she'd been spending more time with her experiments than she was with Janet. Janet did her best to understand. She knew Sam, she knew what she was getting herself into, but there was only so much even the most understanding girlfriend could take.

Stepping into Sam's lab Janet frowned at the untouched lunch on Sam's desk. She'd brought it down herself well over three hours ago. Not even the blue jello had been touched. Looking over at Sam, Janet could feel a smile threaten to break out when she saw the tall blonde standing at her workbench with a pair of round protective welding goggles on. Janet knew from experience that once Sam knew she was there she would raise the goggles up so they rested across the top of her head, which normally wouldn't be an issue since Janet found the look adorably sexy, but she was mad at Sam and didn't want to be distracted from that. Forcing the smile away Janet walked closer to the workbench and called out, "Sam." It wasn't like the soldering iron Sam was using was making a lot of noise so the fact that she didn't respond meant the blonde was lost somewhere in her own head. "Samantha." She tried again. Still no response from the blonde. Now Janet was not only annoyed but growing concerned. "Major Carter!"

Sam jumped as her head whipped up. She blinked behind her goggles as she stared at Janet trying to figure out what was going on. Seeing Janet standing there with her arms cross over her chest and that clearly cross look on her face, Sam was suddenly aware enough to think, oh shit. She gave her girlfriend her best sheepish smile as she pushed the goggles up so Janet could see her eyes. "Hi Janet."

Hi Janet, Janet thought as she gave a short huff. "Weren't you supposed to take a break?"

"I will." Sam replied, reaching up to rub her neck, which ached from being bent for so long, and because she was suddenly feeling a little nervous. "It hasn't been that long since you came down, and I’m nearly finished."

"Sam." Janet scolded. "I brought you lunch hours ago." After she'd been stood up for lunch for the third time that week. “Three and half hours ago to be exact.” 

Sam shook her head as she rubbed sweat from her face with a bandana. "It couldn't have been that long."

"Since I brought your lunch to you, SG17 returned and I've been in surgery for the last two hours removing shrapnel from Lt. Kalan's left thigh and rear end." Janet informed the blonde. She could see the question forming, how did Kalan get shrapnel in his ass, but Janet held up her hand and grunted softly in a way that told Sam not to ask she didn't want to talk about it. "I'll probably be here an hour or two after my shift ends. What are the odds of you stopping by tonight?"

She didn't even know she was doing it, but Sam's eyes darted away from Janet to the piece of alien tech she was working on with a certain look of longing that said she wanted to work on it until she was finished. Sam didn’t like leaving things unfinished or undone, especially if it was something that excited her. 

Janet threw up her hands and groaned. "You know what never mind." She sighed and pinched the bridge of her nose. "At least try to remember to eat, drink something other than coffee, and sleep."

Sam watched as Janet left. Was Janet mad at her about more than skipping lunch? It sure felt like it. Had she done something recently to piss off her girlfriend? Standing there she went over the last few weeks looking for what she could have done to upset Janet enough that the smaller woman would huff and grunt at her before storming out like that. 

"Hey Sam got a minute?" Daniel asked as he walked into Sam's lab. "I need help with…" He stopped when he looked up and saw the look of utter confusion on Sam's face. "What's wrong?" He asked as he moved closer. He looked around to see what Sam was working on and asked, "Did you electrocute yourself again?"

"No." Sam replied as she blinked, pulling herself out of her thoughts. Wait, why would he ask if she'd electrocuted herself again? Did she really do that enough for that to be a go to question? Shaking her head to clear it again she said, "I think Janet's mad at me."

Daniel gave his friend a questioning look. "What did you do?"

"That's just it." Sam admitted. "I have no idea."

Daniel smiled as he asked, "Ok, so what haven't you done?"

"Huh?" Sam replied, turning her completely and utterly confused attention to her friend.

It really wasn't very hard to see why Sam and Daniel were so close; they had a lot of things in common. They were the smart kids, the ones always getting lost in their own heads. Ideas took over so easily and they both had to see things through to the end no matter what. Their trains of thought were express trains with no stops along the way, which sometimes made being normal people a little hard because they didn't take the time to get off and socialize. His time on Abydos, his time with Sha're, had helped him learn to step back a little. His time with Jack and SG1 also helped Daniel to learn to pull himself out of his own head, to at least attempt to have something of a life outside of his research. Adjusting his glasses, a warm smile on his lips, Daniel asked, "When was the last time you two did anything together? When was the last time you had a meal with her that wasn't in the commissary?"

Sam opened her mouth to answer but there were no words. When had been the last time they'd done something together? Pizza and a movie with Cassie? Gone on a date? Slept in the same bed? Fuck. Sam dropped her head. "Aw crap."

"Go home Sam." Daniel told her warmly as he patted her shoulder. "You're paler than normal. I think you've been underground to long." He gave her a playful smirk as he added, "Maybe if you make it up to her, and she isn’t too mad Janet will help you remember how to live on the surface again."

"Yeah, home, good idea, I think I will." Sam replied, her thoughts a little scattered and buzzing in her head at light speed. Then she looked at Daniel, blinked, and added, "Oh, you needed something?"

Daniel shook his head, his expression warm and caring. "It can wait."

Sam gave him a soft smile, which he returned. She watched him start to leave but then something he’d said hit her smack in the face. Daniel had acted as if he knew about her Janet. The way he spoke it sounded like he was giving her advice on how not to lose her girl. Her eyes went a little wide with fear as she called out, "Daniel?"

They were his friends, his family, and he was trained in observation, of course he knew. Daniel wished they felt comfortable enough, safe enough to talk to him about it, but he understood why they couldn't. They were Air Force and even though he wasn't they were sticking to their rules. So, he wouldn’t ask, and for now they wouldn’t tell. Someday they would realize that they needed someone to confide in, that carrying this kind of secret alone for to long would start to weight on them, and when that happened, he would be there for them. Daniel turned to look at Sam and simply smiled.

In that moment Sam knew he knew but he would respect their privacy and keep their secret. Sam felt both relief and concern. She knew now that if she ever needed to talk to someone, she had Daniel. The smile he gave her told her he approved which was also a relief. But that was one more person who knew their secret, one more liability, another person who could without meaning too expose them and ruin it all. Shit. If Daniel had been able to see it, if he'd been able to figure it out, who else knew or would know?

That would have to be a concern for later. Right now, Sam had something more important to think about. Making amends to her girl. How could she have let herself get so caught up in her work she let herself neglect Janet? She was so use to being on her own, so use to her single mindedness when it came to her work, so use to her self-isolated drive when it came to her career, that she forgot she wasn't alone anymore. She really hoped she hadn't completely screwed up. She would fix this, and she would make sure it didn't again.

After checking on her post-op patients Janet went to the women's locker room to change out of her scrubs and back into her uniform. She had a quick end of day debrief with Hammond, and then she would be free to head home. Making her way over to her locker to retrieve her toiletry bag, Janet twirled the lock absentmindedly while trying to decide if she should check on Sam before she left. She was still angry with her, but her concern for Sam’s wellbeing always took priority over hurt feelings. When she pulled opened the locker door, she quickly spotted the single pink daisy on the shelf, and the little note card propped up against it. Janet bit her lip, refusing to smile, as she picked up the flower. As if a daisy was going to make up for being ignored for far too long. Still, she couldn’t help but place the flower under her nose as she reached for the note card. Flipping it open she saw Sam’s handwriting scratch out a simple, 'I'm sorry.'

"You should be." She whispered in a soft huff. Janet smelled the daisy, allowed herself a small smile, and then slipped it and the note into her purse before grabbing her toiletry bag and a towel and heading into the showers. Once she was back in uniform, she made her way up to Hammond’s office, and then made one last pitstop in the infirmary to check on SG17. Deciding to discharge everyone but Kalan, Janet needed to return to her office to start on the paperwork before she could leave. Opening the long drawer to get a pen she found a second pink daisy and a second note card that read, 'I'm an idiot.' This time she didn’t even bother trying not to smile. "Yes, you are." She agreed. She sniffed the daisy and then put it in the pencil cup on her desk until she left for the night.

When she got home that night Janet found a third daisy and note taped to the front door. 'Forgive me?' She smiled as she once again took in the flower's scent. "Maybe." She said out loud before unlocking the door and stepping inside. The house smelled really good, and it was coming from her kitchen. So was the softly playing music. Shania Twain. It certainly wasn't Cassie listening to the radio in the kitchen if it was playing country. If Janet had to listen to Youth of the Nation one more time, she was going to send Cassie's CDs through the Stargate. Setting her bag down by the stairs Janet leaned against the banister as she pulled off her shoes. Even though she knew it wasn't Cassie who was home she still called out, "Cassandra? Honey, I'm home."

Sam came out of the kitchen just as Janet was walking into the living room. She smiled sweetly while wiping her hands on a dishtowel. "Cass is having pizza with her friends. She'll be home later."

"It's a school night." Janet replied, her voice even and casual, perhaps even a little frosty. She wasn't about to give in so easily. It was going to take more than a few flowers, dinner, and wearing the soft, blue silk tank top she liked seeing Sam in because it clung to her in all the right places, for Sam to make amends.

"She'll be home by nine." Sam said as she moved closer to her lover. She could see the tension in Janet's body, and it hurt knowing she was the reason for it. "Janet."

"Sam." Janet said as she tried to take a step back, but Sam had a long reach. Sam's fingers brushed against her jaw line and Janet had to fight her own body's response to let her eyes flutter closed.

"I'm sorry." Sam said softly. "I guess I'm still not use to us. I've always been so focused on my work that it's still kind of a novelty to me, ya know? I never really saw myself having any kind of a personal life, not one like this, like what we have. I don't want to put us at risk, Janet. I'm going to work on not getting so caught up like this again, but I need something from you if I'm going to change a lifetime of habits. Baby, you got to tell me when I'm doing it. You got to tell me you're upset with me and why. You know I can be a little dense when it comes to people."

Now Janet felt guilty. She had been rather passive aggressive with her feelings instead of talking to Sam clearly about them. "You're not dense when it comes to people, Sam. You're actually really good with people. Daniel isn't the only one who keeps SG1's humanity intact." Reaching up she curled her fingers around Sam's hand to hold it in place while leaning her cheek into Sam's touch. "But I understand what you're saying, and I promise, I'll try to be less huffy and passive aggressive."

"Good." Sam said with a smile while pulling Janet into her arms. "Because I have a feeling your next tactic to get my attention would have involved being less than gentle with large needles."

Janet laughed softly before stretching upward to kiss Sam. It was their first real kiss in too long and it could have easily gotten out of hand, but Janet was starving and the wonderful smells coming from the kitchen made her stomach grumble. Pulling back from Sam she smiled and asked, "You made me dinner?"

Sam nodded with a bright happy smile. "Chicken parmesan, penne with sun dried tomatoes, garlic bread, and I picked up a cheesecake for dessert."

"You made all of that before I got home?" Janet asked in awe as she looked up into Sam’s bright blue eyes. 

"I left about twenty minutes after you stormed out of my lab." Sam said with a smile. "That was about an hour before your shifted ended and you stayed late."

"I'm impressed." Janet said before rewarding Sam with another kiss.

When the kiss ended Sam said, "Everything's almost ready. Why don't you get changed while I fished up?"

"Sounds good." Janet agreed but then pulled Sam in to kiss her again before finally letting her go and heading upstairs.

Janet had completely changed the trajectory of Sam's life and it was going to take time for her to make the right course corrections. She didn't doubt that this new path her life was taking was the better one. It was just going to take time for Sam to get use to no longer being alone. She was slowly starting to realize that the Stargate program could end tomorrow, and she could be discharged from the Air Force, but as long as she had Janet she'd be ok with that. The one thing she could never ever be alight with was losing Janet.


	5. Chapter 5

Walking out of General Hammond's office Sam hoped she had the right expression on her face. She had just spent the last hour with the General who'd explained that he was not only putting SG1 on stand down for a week, but also banning them from the complex all together. He'd actually ordered Sam to take a vacation, a proper out of state vacation. Had she ever actually gone on a proper vacation? She’d gone on family trips with her parents and Mark when she was a kid, normally whenever her dad was home on leave during summer breaks. The year they went to Disney World had been one of Sam’s favorites, because she remembered how happy her mom had been on that trip. Has she taken a real go away for a week vacation as an adult? No. Sam hadn't wanted to take the time away from her work. She took time off sure, though most of that was required medical leave, but even on her days off it wasn't uncommon to find her in the mountain somewhere. People knew this, which is why Sam was hoping to look put out and kind of pissed at being forced to take a vacation. She must have been pulling it off because as she made her way down the hallway people were getting out of her way.

Walking into the infirmary Sam looked around for Janet. When she didn't see her right away, she called out for her. There were several members of Janet's staff around, so Sam made a point of grumbling before calling out again. "Janet? Janet!"

"Right here, Sam." Janet said as she came around the corner. "Are you hurt?" She asked, her gaze falling on the blonde to look for injuries. "Did you electorate yourself again?"

"No, I'm fine." Sam replied.

Janet gave her friend a scolding look. "Then don't come in here yelling like that if you're not hurt."

"What did you put in your last report to Hammond?" Sam asked as she followed the doctor around like a pouting puppy. "Because he's making us take a full seven days off. He banned me from the mountain, Janet. Told me to take a real vacation and then made it an order. I don't think he can make that an order."

Janet was smirking and trying to keep Sam from seeing it, so she was trying to keep her back to the woman. "A nice holiday doesn't sound so bad. You really could use the break, Sam."

Sam grumbled. "You did say something didn't you?"

Finally turning to face her friend Janet tried hard to look sweet and innocent. "I might have mentioned the need for SG1 to take some personal time off, time away from the mountain and the program, yes."

"Janet!" Sam barked and then grumbled. There were several snickers over her shoulder. Janet’s staff always got a kick out of the tiny doctor putting their most elite team members in their place. Sam bit her cheek to stop herself from smiling when Janet threw a glare at her nurses. Once Janet was looking at her again, she huffed while crossing her arms over her chest. "Fine, you got me into this, ask for some time off."

Janet's eyes went a little wide. "What? Why?"

"Because if you don't take the time off too, I'll have to give in and go fishing with the Colonel." Sam shuddered at the thought. "Please Janet, if I'm really your best friend you won't make me go fishing with the Colonel."

"Did Cassie teach you that face? Or did you teach it to her?" Janet teased before setting down her files and crossing her arms over her chest. She sighed as Sam continued to give her a fairly good begging puppy face. "Ok, fine. I'll see what I can do. Cassie's off school next week, so maybe the three of us can figure something out."

Sam relaxed as soon as Janet said that. "Well, I guess it won't be so bad then."

It was kind of strange pretending like they didn't already have this all planned out. They'd been thinking of going away together and with Cassie's upcoming school break it would give the three of them a chance to spend some time away from all the secrets and half-truths that governed their lives. The plan was for Sam to leave Friday right after work so she could spend a day with Mark and his family before flying up to Lake Tahoe where she'd meet up with Janet and Cassie. They'd book a two-bedroom suite, which would give everyone their own beds, though Sam had no plans to be in any bed that didn't have Janet in it. More often than not these days Sam was sleeping at Janet's rather than her own home. If anyone questioned why, she told them having her house bugged and then stormed into by Simmons had left her feeling violated, so she’d made the decision to sell it. She couldn’t buy a new place without selling the old one first, so until then she was staying in Janet's spare bedroom when she wasn't staying in her quarters on base. Given Sam’s closeness with Cassie, and everyone knowing she and Janet were best friends, no one had batted an eye when Janet offered up her extra room to Sam after ‘discovering’ that Sam was sleeping on base every night following the Simmons/Orlin incident. 

After leaving the infirmary Sam headed for the elevators with a bit of a bounce in her step. She had a lot to get done before her mandatory banishment at the end of the week, so she was heading to her lab. For the first time in a very long time Sam was happy, truly happy, in all aspects of her life. It was almost strange for her to feel so content. There was a small smile on her lips, and she was humming softly as she stepped into the elevator. 

"Carter." Jack's voice sounded from behind her. "You're humming."

"Am I, Sir?" Sam replied with a bit of surprise in her tone, though she wasn’t sure if the surprise was from having not noticed Jack when she got on, or from finding out she was absentmindedly humming. 

Jack moved to stand right beside Sam as he said, "You are."

"Sorry." Sam replied, though the smile said she wasn't.

Jack stood there just looking at her for a long moment. "So," He said when the silence became too awkward. "Seven whole days and you can't sneak back onto base to work on one of your little projects. Whatever will you do? Oh, I know! Fishing!"

Sam managed to hold back a groan. "Actually Sir, I have plans."

"You do?" Jack replied. He didn't bother to cover the shock on his face.

Sam nodded. "Going to spend some time in California."

"Ah." Jack replied with a touch of disappointment in his tone. "Well, sounds nice. Have fun, Carter. Tell Mark and the kids I said hey."

"I'll will, Sir." Sam said brightly before practically bouncing off the elevator on her floor.

Even though they'd come a long way in repairing their relationship recently, Sam and Mark were far from close. Sam was more likely to turn to Daniel in those times when one would turn to a sibling these days. But Sam still enjoyed spending time with Mark, and his kids were always a lot of fun to spoil and hang out with. She and Mark were basically getting to know each other all over again. The adults they were now weren't anything like the kids they'd been before their mother's death. Spending the day with Mark and his kids had been nice but Sam was glad it was only for a day. Mark didn't know her well enough to see the change in her so he couldn't help but tell her he was worried that she was too caught up in her work, just like their father had been. He asked if she ever planned on having a personal life, someone to love, maybe kids of her own. Sam knew he meant well but it was annoying. She wanted nothing more than to shut him up by telling him about Janet and Cassie, but she couldn't. She could tell him, he wasn't military, but truth was she didn't trust him, nor did she know him well enough to know his point of view on the whole thing. She had to protect what was most precious to her and that was Janet and what they had together.

"Are you sure you can't stick around for a couple more days?" Mark asked as he heaved his sister's bag from the trunk of his car. "The kids would love having their Aunt Sam around a little longer."

"Thanks Mark, but I already told you my friend Janet invited me to join her and her daughter for a few days. They're expecting me." Sam said with a warm smile. "I'll stick around longer next time. I promise."

Mark walked his sister to the airline gate and as he handed over her carry on he said, "Maybe next time you'll let me introduce you to Pete."

Sam groaned. "Mark."

"Come on, Sam. I think you two would hit it off." Mark said with a smile. "It couldn't hurt to meet him."

Sam just shook her head. "Bye Mark."

"Bye Sam." Mark replied as he hugged her.

Nonstop Denver to Lake Tahoe was a two and half hour flight, which meant Janet and Cassie were already on their plane as Sam boarded in San Diego for her hour and half flight north. Janet couldn't help but watch Cassie the whole time. The girl had completely lost her budding adolescent attitude somewhere under all the excitement. When Cassandra first came to live with her Janet watched as the girl tried to learn about her new home, not just the home Janet had given her, but also the brand new world she found herself on. The more Cassie learned the longer the list of things she wanted to experience became. Learning to ski had been on the list for a long time and despite the fact that they lived in Colorado this was the first chance Cassie would get to cross that experience off her list.

Turning away from the window to face her mother Cassie asked, "You've never been skiing before?"

Janet shook her head, a warm smile on her lips. "Nope. Looks like Sam will have to show us both how it's done."

Cassie nodded and smiled back. "Sam use to go with her Mom." She said it like it was something Janet knew but Sam had never mentioned it to Janet. "Her Mom was kind of outdoorsy. She liked to go hiking and stuff like that. Sam has a picture of her, her mom, her brother and Jacob in front of some trees, it was taken somewhere in Lake Tahoe I think, it’s one of her favorites."

The whole trip suddenly took on a new light for Janet. Sam was sharing something with them that she'd shared with her mother. For a moment Janet wondered if Sam even realized she was doing it. Not for the first time Janet wondered what Debra Carter was really like and wished Sam would talk about her a little more. Looking over at Cassie, Janet realized Sam must have talked about her own mother to help Cassie deal with her loss. Sam was a little older when Debra was killed but not much. She would have been able to understand a little better what Cassie was going through, more so than Janet who'd been an adult when her father died. "We'll have to make sure we take one while we're there to go with it."

"Oh, that's a great idea, Mom!" Cassie said excitedly.

"I've been known to have a few." Janet teased with a chuckle.

Their plane landed first. Janet fought the urge to grab Cassie's hand as they made their way to baggage claim. She had to remind herself that the girl wasn’t a small child but a teenager who wouldn’t like having her mommy holding her hand in public as if she were a little girl. Janet did, however, keep her eyes on her girl as they navigated through the crowd of travelers, and managed to stick close in case she needed to grab hold of Cassie in a moment’s notice. They were supposed to meet Sam in baggage, and then they would head over to the car rental so Sam could pick out their car. Apparently, Sam didn’t trust Janet not to get what she called a ‘mom’ car. 

"Mom," Cassie whined. "I'm hungry. Where's Sam?"

"I know, honey." Janet replied as she scanned the area. "We'll have dinner as soon as we've checked into the resort."

"Can't we eat now?" Cassie begged. "I'm sure there's a McDonalds around here somewhere. That way we can just start skiing when we get to the resort."

"No Cassie." Janet answered firmly. "We're going to wait for Sam, and then head over to the resort. We're going to have a nice dinner together and get settled in. Sam's going to get the skiing thing started in the morning."

"Mom." Cassie whined.

"Cassandra." Janet warned.

Thankfully for Cassie, Sam spotted them before the teen could push her mother any further. Sam practically lit up as she waved to get their attention. Janet waved back and once Cassie saw her, the girl seemed to magically appear right in front of her. Sam laughed. "Hiya kid."

"Finally." Cassie said as if she'd been suffering from something awful and Sam was there to rescue her. "Let’s go!"

"Cassandra." Janet warned again.

Sam bit back a laugh. She wasn't sure what was going on, but she knew Janet was using her mom voice for a reason and laughing wouldn't help matters. "I've got my bags. I'm good to go if you two are."

"We are." Janet said with a nod.

Much to Janet's surprise Sam hadn't gone for a muscle car or a sports car but a Range Rover. The look of utter delight on the blonde's face worried her a little. When Janet asked about her choice in cars Sam's eyes lit up and she simply said, "Off roading." Janet wasn't really sure why that was such an exciting reason, but she had a feeling she'd find out at some point this week.

When they got to the resort it was Sam's turn to be surprised. Janet had somehow managed to get a great deal at a really nice resort with a nationally known name on short notice. They were upgraded to a mountain view suite upon check in that didn't seem as random as the woman behind the desk made it seem. Walking into the stunning room Sam instantly knew something was up. The living room had a gas fireplace and floor to ceiling windows with a view that took her breath away. The master bedroom had a fireplace and a king-sized bed while the guest room had a queen. The bathroom had a tub, shower, and Jacuzzi. There was a small kitchenette and dining table, flat screen tv, and did she mention the views? "Janet?"

Janet simply smiled sweetly.

It was Cassie who finally said, "Grandma works for the national chain. You should have seen the room we had in Orlando!"

Janet looked a bit sheepish and that made Sam laugh.

After they settled in and washed off the travel ick the three of them dressed for a night out. They went to the resort's best restaurant where Sam had the best salmon outside of Alaska she's ever had. Cassie shocked both of her moms by not only finishing her fried cauliflower but Janet's Brussels sprouts. And Janet had an affair with a slice of twice baked lemon cheesecake, that she would be talking about for weeks. After dinner they drove out to the downtown area and walked around for a while. They managed to find a family friendly free concert, that also just happened to end in fireworks. As far as they were concerned it was a good omen that this was going to be a really good trip. That night when they finally got back to their suite after driving around a little following their night out, and after sending Cassie off to bed, Janet and Sam settled in front of the fire in their bedroom with a bottle of wine.

"Cassie mentioned on the plane that you use to do stuff like this when you were younger." Janet said carefully. It had been an itch in the back of her mind all day. She really wanted to know more about Sam's life before the SGC, before the Air Force, before her mom died.

Sam nodded. She'd had such a wonderful evening with her family, and that's just what Janet and Cassie were, that she was feeling more willing than normal to talk. "With my Mom. She liked being out in nature, out in the woods and mountains." Sam was quiet for a moment, lost in her memories. She smiled. " I think she found being out in nature kind of comforting."

"Comforting?" Janet asked as she snuggled into Sam's side. Sam put her arm around her and smiled.

"Yeah." Sam replied. "We moved around a lot because of Dad, but no matter where in the world we were living, there was always a park, always woods to walk through, or mountains to hike, or a body of water to splash around in."

That made sense to Janet. Until Cassie she hadn't really worried about or even thought about the transient lifestyle of the military. It was another reason working at the SGC meant so much to her. Being stationed at Cheyenne Mountain gave her the luxury of stability, which meant she'd been able to give Cassie a real home in a nice neighborhood with good schools.

Sam suddenly laughed softly. "She always wanted to rent an RV and drive up the west coast all the way to Alaska."

"Really?" Janet replied as she looked up at Sam. There were unshed tears in her love's blue eyes but a smile on her lips that said they weren't all together bad tears.

"Yeah." Sam said softly. When she realized she had tears in her eyes she was quick to wipe them away. "Dad was never around long enough to do it though, that’s kind of a long trip when it’s done right, and we never had more than a week, maybe two if we were lucky."

Janet didn't even hesitate. "Maybe it's something we could do for her."

Sam turned to look at Janet, their eyes meeting for a long moment, and then she smiled. “That would be amazing.” Sam said before drawing Janet in for a grateful kiss. “I think she’d really approve of that idea.” 

The next morning after breakfast the three of them headed out for a day on the slopes. First, they were all fitted for the right ski equipment, which they would be renting for now. Perhaps if this turned out to be something that they all enjoyed they'd buy their own later. Then after getting their lift passes, they headed up to the slopes. It had been years since Sam had skied but she was a bit too proud to ask for an instructor just yet. She wanted to teach her girls the basics herself. Everything started out well enough once Sam had shown them how to lock their boots into their skies, and the snowplow position. Janet was a little wobbly, but Cassie picked things up pretty quickly. When they finally started slowly sliding down the hill there was plenty of falling and laughing. The cold as well as her laughter had flushed Janet's cheeks and her eyes were bright with happiness. Sam found herself watching Janet more than paying attention to herself, which led to her sliding backwards a few times, making Janet squeal with concern more than once.

They practiced starting, stopping, and speed control until hunger and the cold got the better of them, and then went to one of the ski in/out restaurants for lunch. Janet's doctor mom side came out after lunch and it was decided that shopping would be better than more skiing. She insisted that if they spent the afternoon hours the way they had the morning hours none of them would be able to move in the morning. It was partly true. She had also had quite enough falling for one day. Shopping might have been less physical than skiing but by the time the three of them trudged into their suite they were all wiped out. Cassie recovered quickly enough, and Janet gave her permission to go to the resort's teen lounge. That gave Janet and Sam some time alone. They changed into their swimsuits and headed for the hot tub where Janet discovered she really liked a champagne cocktail called the Cork County Bubbles.

In fact, Janet liked the Jameson Irish whisky and champagne cocktail so much that she might have had a little too much their last night at the resort. Cassie had been hanging out with new friends and they'd gone back to the hot tub. Their trip had started off with fireworks and had ended with a trip to the ER.

"Hey Carter." Jack called out as he followed Sam down the hall. "So, why is ol' Doc Frasier sporting an arm sling these days?"

"Oh, it's just a sprain, Sir. She'll be just fine in a week or so." Sam replied, while hoping to god she wasn’t blushing.

Jack looked relieved. "How'd she get a sprain like that?"

"Skiing just isn't Janet's thing, Sir." Sam told him with a slight grin and a shrug.

"Skiing?" Jack repeated.

Yeap, skiing, Sam thought while nodding and smiling. There was no way, even if she could be open and honest about her relationship with Janet, that they were telling anyone that Janet had fallen out of bed during sex and sprained her wrist because they'd both been kind of drunk. That was just one of those memoires meant for the two of them, a memory Sam wasn’t going to let Janet forget any time soon.


	6. Chapter 6

The afternoon and evening had started out so well. It was Cassandra's birthday. Daniel had been able to translate Hanka's calendar, which wasn't too far off from their own, so they were able to celebrate on Cassie's actual birthday. Four years ago, on the first birthday Cassie had spent on Earth and with Janet, they'd invited Sam to join them for the day. They'd gone to the movies, had dinner, opened presents and had cake and ice cream, just the three of them. It became their tradition. Even after Cassie had made friends at school, and they started having a small party for her at Janet’s, they always did dinner and a movie together as a family first. But this year was a little different, or at least Cassie had wanted it to be different. Her birthday fell on a Friday, and while she was good with spending the afternoon with her Mom and Sam, she wanted to spend the evening with her friends. Just like every year for the past four years the three of them went to the movies, then they came home and had a great time making homemade pizzas together, Cassie laughing happily as Sam made a mess and Janet scolded her for it. Then about halfway through opening her presents Cassie started to get antsy. The more antsy Cassie got the more flustered Janet got.

It had been uncomfortable and a little tense but not really anything new. Cassie had been testing her limits lately, which was natural. Janet was a great mom and even though she was clearly frustrated at times, she took Cassie's attitude in stride. Janet let Cassie know she would be having cake with them, Dominic was welcome to join them, but if Cassie kept pushing, she could just forget going out at all since she was just getting over the flu. Cassie had given in to her mother's wishes and had gone out to talk to Dominic on the front porch. That's when everything went wrong. That's when Sam's heart stopped. That's when Janet's world began to tremble and crack, threatening to split apart entirely.

"Cassie? Baby? Cassie wake up!" Janet pleaded while kneeling beside her daughter’s body. 

"What the hell happened?" Sam had demanded, her gaze shifting between her girlfriend and their little girl and the trembling boy standing a few feet away. 

He'd kissed her! That punk ass little bag of hormones kissed her little girl! Who the hell did he think he was? Who said he could go around kissing her little girl! If Janet hadn't been in doctor major mode and snapped Sam out of her thoughts so they could get Cassie to the infirmary Sam would have throttled the boy. She would just have to settle for baring the full weight of her best Major Carter glare on the boy, and taking a little satisfaction out of making him jump when she snapped at him to go home.

Sam drove them to the base while Janet sat in the back seat with Cassie's head in her lap. Because Cassie was a human alien, and because of her past with Nirrti, they couldn’t take her to a normal hospital. So, Sam was taking them to the mountain. Which was fine with Janet because the mountain was her domain. In the backseat of the car Janet had kept her voice soft and reassuring as she spoke to her daughter, reassured her, and comforted her. But as soft and soothing as Janet was trying to keep her voice, Sam could still hear the emotion, the fear, and the worry. 

Once they'd gotten Cassie into a bed in the infirmary and Janet had given her first round of orders she disappeared. Sam wondered where she had gone and was about to go looking for her girlfriend when Janet came back wearing her uniform and lab coat. It took a few minutes for Sam to realize why Janet had taken the time to change into her uniform so quickly after arriving, leaving Cassie in the care of her nurses instead of herself. Janet was wearing her uniform like a suit of armor. She needed the buffer the uniform gave her, she needed to be Dr. Fraiser to see to Cassie's medical needs, and Major Fraiser to be strong enough to handle whatever was happening, and she needed both of those sides of herself to keep Cassie's mom from totally breaking down. The moment Sam realized that, she changed too.

Cassie had been the catalyst for all the change in Janet's life. Sam brought her Cassie but then Cassie had turned around and brought her Sam. Janet couldn't, she wouldn't, think of her life without either of them. When Cassie's initial test results came in with no answers to what was going on that only fueled Janet's need to figure this out. She felt like she was walking a sword's edge, balancing what she needed to do as a doctor and being there for Cassie as her mother. Having Sam close by helped. Every time Janet felt as if she were going to fall off the edge, Sam would touch her, pulling her back. Sam's hand on her shoulder or the brush of her fingers on the back of Janet's hand, simple, common gestures of comfort and support, but to Janet they were anchors to steady her and reminders of Sam’s love.

Sitting across from Janet at the table in the briefing room after SG1’s return from Cassie’s home planet, Sam kept one eye on the video Daniel was playing and the other on Janet. While the scene playing out on the video was hard to watch, it was harder to see the fear in Janet's eyes. Thinking that Cassie would suffer the way the girl on the video was caused Janet such pain, and all Sam wanted to do was make that pain and Cassie's go away, but she couldn’t, and that left Sam feeling powerless. When it was decided that SG1 would return to Hanka to investigate, Sam had been truly torn. She knew the best way for her to help Cassie was to investigate what happened on her home planet, but that meant leaving her and Janet and that didn't set right with her heart at all. Now, with a little more information to work from but still no clear direction towards helping Cassie, Sam’s helplessness grew and twisted in her heart.

Alone in the locker room following the briefing, Sam pulled Janet into her arms and held her as tightly as she could. "We'll figure this out, Janet."

"I know." Janet said softly, her words muffled from having her face pressed into Sam’s chest. She needed the comfort and strength being in Sam’s arms offered her right now, regulations be damned. 

"She's a tough kid.” Sam said as she ran her fingers soothingly through Janet’s hair. “She's strong." She reassured her love. Pulling back a little she titled Janet's head up, smiled lovingly and looked her in the eyes. "Like her mom."

They hadn't shared a kiss on base since Janet's impromptu kiss following the Entity. They had been so very careful, but right now they needed the connection they shared. The kiss was tender and full of love and reassurance that they would get through this, and they would do it together. Janet would need that reassurance and then some.

Janet wasn't sure what hurt worse, watching Cassie suffering from the damn virus or Cassie's words. "You're not my mother!" Bounced around in Janet's head repeatedly as she worked. The only time she didn't hear those words was when they were replaced by, "You're killing me!" Janet had never felt so scared, so helpless and lost, in her entire life. Cassie had only been in her life for a short time, four years, but Janet couldn't remember what life was like without her now. Nor could she picture her life moving forward without Cassandra in it. Standing in the observation booth looking down at her little girl, the precious gift given to her by Sam and the Stargate, Janet felt powerless and on the verge of tears, but she needed to be strong for Cassie. Sam was back on Hanka looking for ways to help but right in that moment she wanted Sam beside her, she needed Sam beside her, because she felt her strength weaning and those tears were getting harder and harder to hold back. 

As if summoned by Janet's plea the door opened and Sam walked in. It took everything in her to simply stand beside Janet, to not pull her into her arms, but unlike the locker room they had no privacy in the observation booth. The look in Janet's eyes when she turned to look up at Sam, however, let Sam know that discretion had its time and place and now was not it. In that moment Sam didn't care who saw them and what they would think. In that moment Janet needed her. Gently taking her by the shoulder Sam turned Janet away from the window and wrapped her arms around her in a tight hug. She didn't say anything, she didn't have too, they'd always had a kind of sixth sense with each other and now was no different. Sam was offering just what Janet needed and Janet was taking in her fill. When Janet finally pulled away, she began telling Sam about what happened in the hall and why they'd had to move Cassie into an isolation room. When they were both feeling stronger and more in control they went to talk to Cassie. When Cassie said they wouldn't be able to stop what Nirrti was doing to her Janet had never wanted to fight for anything so hard in her life. In that moment she made a silent vow to herself and her daughter that she would do everything and anything to save Cassandra's life.

In the four years since Cassie had been in their lives Sam had never once truly reprimanded the girl. Janet was her parent and Sam was the fun aunt who showed up every other Saturday. Things had changed a little bit when Sam and Janet started dating. Sam was around a lot more, she practically lived with them, so she'd started taking a little bit more of a parental role in Cassie's life, but she still and always would follow Janet's lead. But when Cassie said Janet wasn't her real mother something in Sam snapped into place, and for the first time in their life together Sam acted like Cassandra's parent and Janet's true partner.

"Cassandra Fraiser, I know you feel like crap, and I know you're scared, but don't ever let me hear you being so disrespectful towards Janet like that again." Sam took hold of Cassie's chin and made the girl look at her, their eyes locking. "For the last four years she has been your mother in every real way that truly matters. Janet didn't give birth to you Cassandra, but her love for you is very real, every bit as real as what your birth mom felt for you, and sick or not you are not going to take that away from her or yourself."

There were tears in Cassie's eyes as she said, "Can’t you see! It's better this way!"

"Why?" Sam demanded.

"It’s different now. I'm different now." The girl tried to explain. She showed Sam what she could do. She moved the chess piece with her mind. "What do you see when you look at me now?"

"I see you." Sam reassured. "And until your head starts spinning and you start spewing green pea soup, and probably even then, I will still see you. None of this changes how we feel about you, Cass. Your Mom,” Sam emphasized the word mom with a pointed look, “and I love you, we will always love you, end of story. Now stop trying to push her away."

Cassie would try but she knew something inside her was changing, was different. She really believed there would be nothing Janet or Sam or the others could do. She didn't mean to hurt them. She was trying to protect them. She just couldn't see that it was causing more pain than preventing it.

She hadn't called her Janet in such a long time. Hearing Cassie use her name instead of calling her mom hurt more than picking up the hot chess piece. She hoped Cassie would just listen to her and fight this, but Cassie seemed so set on giving in. She managed to keep it together long enough to stay with Cassie a little longer, but when she felt her resolve weakening she kissed Cassie's forehead and told her she'd be back after she looked over some test results. She practically begged the girl to get some sleep and then left the room. She managed to make it to the privacy of her lab before breaking down into tears. She wasn't sure when Sam had come in, but she suddenly found herself in her lover's arms, clinging to her.

"It's going to be alright, Janet." Sam whispered.

"You don't know that!" Janet yelled at her as she pulled away. "She's getting worse and there's nothing I can do to help!"

"We'll figure this out!" Sam shouted back just to snap Janet out of it.

The intensity in Sam's eyes, the sharpness of her voice was enough to snap Janet out of her moment of weakness. She scrubbed at the wetness on her cheeks and in her eyes with her hands and then went to her computer to look over Cassie's latest tests. What she saw there reminded her of Jack's scans back when he had all that Ancient knowledge in his head. Cassie was right about one thing, the retrovirus was changing her, but into what? And how did Janet stop it? 

Sam promised Janet she'd try to get Cassie to sleep if she slept a little herself. Janet said she would, but Sam had a feeling Janet wouldn't make it to a bed any time soon. She did keep her end of the deal, however, and was sitting with Cassie, trying to get the girl to rest. 

"Sam?" Cassie’s voice was soft and small. 

"Yeah kid?" Sam replied, looking up to meet Cassie’s gaze. 

"Promise me…" Cassie began.

Sam quickly cut her off. Cassie was so sure she was dying that she'd already made Sam promise to be there at the end because she was afraid of dying alone. Sam didn't want to think of that as a real possibility and the fact that Cassie had accepted it so easily was really starting to piss her off. "Cassie, stop, please, we're going to find a way to help. You’re not going to die. I promise."

Cassie shook her head. "It's too late." She insisted. "Sam, please. Promise me you'll take care of her. Don't let her be alone. She's going to blame herself; you know she is, but don't let her. This isn't her fault. There's nothing she can do."

"Cassie." Sam begged with tears in her eyes.

"Promise me, Sam." Cassie demanded. "Promise me you'll take care of my Mom."

"You know I will." Sam whispered hoarsely and then gave in to the girl, knowing Cassie needed to hear her say it. “I promise, Cassie. I’ll take care of her, I love her, you know that.” 

Cassie nodded. “I know, and I know you love me. I love you and Mom too.” 

She couldn't believe they were sitting there talking about options. There were no options. Nirrti could save Cassie's life, and saving Cassie's life was all that mattered! The logical part of Sam understood why they were talking about this, but the part that loved Cassie was screaming this was a waste of time that Cassie didn't have. Sam was grateful that Jack was fighting for Cassie, she knew how much he loved her. But what threw Sam for a loop was when Teal'c spoke up, it was like a knife through Sam's heart, because she thought her friend loved her daughter as much as Jack and Daniel did. 

"I am in agreement with General Hammond." The big man said from his place beside Daniel.

"What?" Jack replied in disbelief.

"The life of a child may be sacrificed, but Nirrti processes valuable information that may be lost if we allow her to leave." Teal'c said despite the looks he was getting from across the table.

"I'm sorry." Sam said in a slow disbelieving voice. "What the hell did you just say?" She stared at Teal'c as if she didn't even know him. "You're ok with just letting Cassie die?" The shock of Teal'c's words were fading into hurt and anger. "She's not just a child, Teal'c!" Sam was on her feet and slamming her hands down on the table. "She's Janet's child!" She's my child! "Maybe the Jaffa are willing to sacrifice their children's lives like they're meaningless, but that's not how we do things here!"

"And if it starts to become the way we do things, then it's time for us to pack it in and call it quits." Jack added. "Because then we've become something I won't fight for."

"Agreed." Daniel said with a nod.

Cassandra was on the verge of death and they had the woman responsible. The people she trusted and cared about where sitting around talking about wither they were going to help her daughter or let her die. Janet couldn't take it anymore. This was her little girl's life they were play politics with. When Cassie had nightmares about what happened on Hanka it was Janet who soothed her back to sleep and held her through the night. When Cassie cried it was Janet who wiped those tears away. When Cassie hurt, she made it better. When Cassie was happy, she got to hear her laugh and feel the warmth of her smiles. She'd watched that scared little girl they’d found huddled in a field, grow into the plucky, vibrant, sassy, loving, teen she was now. They could talk themselves blue in the face for all she cared. Janet was going to do whatever she had to do, to help Cassandra, to help her daughter. So, she picked up the sedative from the medical tray, and made her way down to the holding cell. She drugged the airman guarding the door after he unlocked it, took his sidearm, and walked in with every intention of either forcing Nirrti to help or killing her where she stood. When the room flooded with other airmen Janet never wavered. She held the gun on Nirrti, her finger on the trigger, her aim steady. She would give it all up, her career, her freedom, her own life, to save her daughter's. "You will save her life, or I will kill you."

There was something in Janet's eyes that told the goa'uld she spoke the truth. Janet saw the truth as well. Nirrti was scared. Then Hammond, Sam and the others came in. Janet never took her eyes off Nirrti, not even when Sam spoke. Her aim held true; her hand as steady with the gun as it was with a scalpel. The oaths she took as a military officer and as a doctor didn't matter in that moment, the only thing that mattered was the promise she made to Cassandra as her mother; to protect and care for her no matter what.

"I can't help Cassandra she can." Janet said when Sam asked her not to do this.

The pain in Janet's voice, the fear, the sadness, the helplessness, Sam heard it and it broke her heart. She stood there watching unsure of what to do. Part of her was all for letting Janet do whatever it was Janet had planned, but another part of her wanted to protect Janet not only from Nirrti but also from herself.

"SG1 has already asked me to make a deal for Cassandra's life." Hammond said gently. "This isn't necessary."

Most of SG1, Sam thought as she shot a glare in Teal'c's direction. The deal was struck. Nirrti would be allowed to leave with her life if Cassandra lived. Janet finally stood down, handing the sidearm to Sam. Everyone in the room relaxed. They left Nirrti to Jack and Hammond and left the room together. Once they were in the elevator Sam slammed the stop button and then turned to Janet. She nearly asked if she were ok, but she knew Janet wasn't. "I'm not sure if that was incredibly brave or incredibly stupid."

Janet was starting to tremble. She fell against the wall and rested her hands on the railing as she let her head fall back with a soft thump. "Incredibly desperate. I didn't know what else to do, Sam. She's dying! Our little girl is dying and there isn't a goddamn thing I can do to help her!"

"You did everything you could, Janet." Sam said as she reached for Janet, pulling her towards her and wrapping her arms around the smaller woman. "And when you couldn't do anymore for as a doctor, you did what you had too as her mother, you fought for her."

Janet clung to Sam for several long moments before pulling back and asking, "You're not upset about what I did?"

"Are you kidding me?" Sam replied as she looked down into Janet's dark eyes. "I'm proud of you. You put Cassie first. That's what a good mother does, Janet. You're amazing, and I love you."

For the first time since this nightmare started Janet smiled a little. "I love you too."

"You have waited too long." Nirrti said coldly as she stood beside Cassie’s bed. 

"Try again." Janet growled. The look on her face said it all. She would kill the woman with her bare hands if she didn't, so Nirrti tried again. It would be SGC legend, the way little ol' Doc Fraiser stood her ground and made a goa'uld cower in fear. Janet hadn't been much of the prayer type, but she was praying now. The relief that washed over her when Cassie coughed nearly caused Janet to go weak in the knees. Her vitals were returning to normal and when Cassie opened her eyes, Janet felt her own heart beating again. When Cassie saw Nirrti standing over her the confusion and fear made Janet reach out and put her hand on Cassie's leg.

"Mom?" Cassie said weakly as she stared wide eyed at the goa'uld how had caused her so much pain and trauma. 

"It's ok, honey." Janet reassured as she moved from the foot of Cassie's bed to the side. She took Cassie's hand in her own and held it tightly. "I'm here."

As Nirrti turned to leave Janet reached out and grabbed her arm. The goa'uld glared at her for darling to touching her, but she didn't care. "Is there anything else? Any other nasty surprises you've left behind?"

"No." Nirrti replied. "There is nothing else."

"There had better not be." Janet warned, her grip tightening painfully on the goa’uld’s arm. "Or I will hunt you down myself." No one thought it was a bluff, the truth of Janet’s words was clear in her dark eyes and her protective baring as she stood between the woman and her child. “And I will kill you."

It was over. Cassie was healthy and starting to recover. She was going to be fine. Janet hadn't left her side, except for the hour she spent being halfheartedly reprimanded by Hammond. Sam had stayed with Cassie while Janet was gone, reassuring her that everything was going to be fine. Cassie had been more than a little surprised when she heard what Janet had done, but it left the girl feeling incredibly loved and protected.

"She did that for me?" The girl asked.

Sam nodded and smiled brightly. "She's your mother, Cassie. She'd do anything for you. We both would."

"Sam," Cassie said as she dropped her head. "I was a real bitch towards her."

"Yeah you were." Sam replied with no hesitation. "You'll have to make it up to her."

Cassie nodded. "I will. I promise."

After Janet returned, Sam said she'd go to the house and get some things for Cassie that would make her recovery a little easier. As she walked down the hallway towards the elevator, she wondered how pissed Janet would be if she brought Cassie's dog to her. She knew having the dog to cuddle would make Cassie feel better, and she could always blame the idea on Jack. 

"Major Carter." Teal’c’s voice called out from down the other long hall. 

Sam paused long enough to shoot him a look of warning before sliding her id card in the reader and then stepping into the elevator.

Teal'c took a step towards her but suddenly felt a hand on his shoulder.

"Leave her alone, Teal'c." Jack told him firmly but gently. "It's going to be a long time before she's ok with you again."

"I did not mean…" Teal’c began. 

Jack shook his head, cutting him off. "It doesn't matter what you meant, Teal'c. It doesn't matter if you were trying to play devil's advocate or if you were trying to be a voice of reason or whatever. The way Carter sees it, you voted against Cassie, you choose not to protect her, and that made you a threat to her kid."

"I have hurt her deeply." Teal'c said sadly.

"Yeah, you have. She feels betrayed, Teal'c." Jack told him. "And you'd better hope she hasn't told Fraiser. You don't want to be on her shit list. That woman scared the piss out of a goa'uld for crying out loud."

Cassie spent a week in the infirmary. Janet wasn't taking any chances. Hammond had put SG1 on stand down so Sam was able to spend a bit more time with them since she was working out of her lab. When Cassie was finally allowed to go home the three of them went home together. They spent the first evening just hanging out, watching movies, and eating pizza. When Dominic came over the next day to see Cassie, he brought her a teddy bear and stumbled over his own feet when he walked into the living room and saw Sam sitting there. The boy was afraid of her, good. Janet had to pull her out of the room and into the kitchen with a laugh when Cassie asked for a little privacy. It was good to hear Janet laugh. It was good to see her smiling again, and oh what a smile she'd given them after announcing Cassie could come home. It was a smile that said her family was safe, her family was good; her family was strong. Sam knew this because that's just how she felt. They were a family, Sam’s family, and she would do anything to keep them safe and happy. Even tolerating a boy sitting next to her little girl on Janet’s sofa while they tried not to get watching from the kitchen.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is where this story ended when I first published it. I would like to write a bonus chapter to be published here and only here, but we'll see. Until then, Sam and Janet's story continues in part three of the Matters universe, The Things that Matter in Life. 
> 
> Thanks for reading! 
> 
> ~Reese


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Brand new closing chapter not published anywhere else.

No one expected the young idealist to win the presidency. All of the talking heads and so-called experts had predicted the old, rich, white man the Republicans were running to win. This had included Maybourne who had been even more cocky than normal whenever he slithered out from under his rock. But Maybourne’s man hadn’t won. And upon taking office, the young idealist had hit the ground running as far as getting to work was concerned. One of the first things he did was call a summit of his joint chiefs and several other high ranking military officers and officials at Camp David so that he might gain a better understanding of the military, since he had not served himself. General Hammond, much to everyone’s surprise, had been included in this summit. He left command of the SGC while he was away to Jack O’Neill. 

While Jack played general, Sam was in command of SG1. She’d asked Paul Davis if he’d like to get out from behind his desk for a bit and serve as their fourth. Davis had always been an ally in Washington, and Sam thought he might like a chance at doing more than just reading about the Stargate program. Davis agreed, and SG1 was put back into the active rotation despite the lingering tension between Sam and Teal’c. Sam was still deeply hurt over Teal’c’s seeming willingness to sacrifice Cassie for a silver of a chance at gaining any real information that might aid them in their fight against the goa’uld. While Sam manages to keep her feelings out of missions, things did come to a head between her and Teal’c while working to free Jack and Daniel from natives who were going to execute them for attempting to free their slaves.

“We put our lives on the line to rescue your son! Twice! Because you are our friend, Teal’c.” Sam had reminded him when he had tried yet again to explain that he had only meant to even out the debate they were having at the time. “There shouldn’t have been a debate, Teal’c! You should have been willing to do whatever it took to help protect and save Cassandra, the same way we have always been willing to do whatever it took to save and protect Rya’c!”

Sam loved Teal’c, she really did, and while she continued to trust him when it came to having her back, it would be awhile before she trusted him when it came to Cassie. Logical or not, that was just the way it was for now. She had something beautiful with Janet and Cassie, and at any moment she could lose it, she could have it torn to shreds by countless numbers of outside forces. She needed her closest friends, her brothers, to help her protect it, not make arguments for ripping it away from her. Teal'c had been in the room when Sam was forced to admit her feelings for Janet, and Jack had explained to him why he needed to keep what he knew a secret. And even though she couldn’t come right out and tell them, a part of her had hoped that they knew about her and Janet, about the family they had built together, and that they cared about her enough to help protect it. Teal’c’s actions had caused Sam to call this into question, and suddenly she felt alone in her secrets once again. 

“Alright kids,” Jack called out from the control room. “Play nice out there. We’ll keep the porch light on for ya.” 

“I wish he wouldn’t look at us like that every time we leave.” Daniel whispered to Sam as they approached the Gate. “It’s not our fault he can’t come. Hammond’s the one who put him in charge.” 

Sam chuckled as she stepped into the familiar tingle of the wormhole. 

While Janet had been surprised and hurt when she found out about Teal’c’s comments during the briefing regarding Cassandra, she was a bit more willing to concede the fact that Teal’c was playing devil’s advocate. She wanted to believe more than anything that if it came down to it, Teal’c would protect her daughter just as readily as they would protect his son. 

“Doc!” Jack’s voice bellowed from the exam area. 

Despite the amused and affectionate smile tugging at her lips, Janet’s eyes rolled skyward as if asking for divine strength before making her way toward the man caterwauling his nickname for her. 

“Doc!” Jack’s bellow was quickly taking on a whiny undertone. “Heey Doocc!”

“Yes Colonel.” Janet calls out before he can get his next bellow out. “What can I do for you, Sir?” Jack sticks his lower lip out and starts waving his hands wildly up and down his torso. While most people would have been at a loss, Janet knew Jack O’Neill better than most. “Heartburn again, Sir?” 

“There’s a lava pit in my stomach, Doc.” Jack replies with a helpless and pitiful look. 

“Did SG1 just leave for their mission to PY2-734?” Janet asks as she steps up to him with a knowing look. 

Jack nods. “Yeah, how’d ya know?” 

“You always get a terrible attack of indigestion when they leave without you, Sir.” Janet offers him a soft, comforting smile while she gives him a quick once over just in case. “Don’t worry, Sir. Barring any unforeseen circumstances, General Hammond will be back the first Monday of next month.” After a lot of prodding on her part Janet had gotten Hammond to agree to take some much needed R&R after the summit, extending the amount of time he’d be away from the SGC. “And you’ll be back with SG1 causing trouble all across the galaxy with the cool kids again.” 

“Promise?” Jack pouted. 

“I promise.” Janet replied, still smiling reassuringly at the grown man who not only out ranked her but was a good fifteen years her senior. Taking a step back once she was sure she didn’t feel or hear anything abnormal in the area he’d indicated, Janet pulled a small plastic bottle from her lab coat pocket and handed it to him. “Try these, Sir.” 

Jack took the oddly shaped bottle and shook its contents, creating a loud rattling sound. “What is it?” 

“Fruit flavored chewy antacids, Sir.” Janet answered. “I think you’ll like them better than the chalky tablets, which means you’ll be more likely to actually take them.” He looked skeptical as he shook the bottle again. Janet stood there and watched with a great deal of patience as Jack opened the bottle, shook two round red ones out, and then popped them into his mouth and chewed.

“Mmmm, cherry.” Jack smiled. “Thanks Doc! You’re da best!” 

“You’re welcome, Sir.” Janet said as she watched Jack put the bottle of antacids in his shirt pocket, pat it twice, and then turn on his heel and leave her domain. 

For the entire month Hammond was gone, whenever Jack got restless he would leave the general’s office and make his way to Sam’s lab, or Daniel’s office, or the training room which is where Teal’c could often be found. If the three of them were off world, then it was Janet who got paid the visit. She never really minded, as long as she wasn’t busy, when he showed up, and Sam always rewarded her with an extra bit of attention when they got home. Her payment, Sam had teased, for babysitting Jack while they were away. 

“How was your vacation, Sir?” Janet asked Hammond upon his return. 

Hammond smiled brightly. “Took the girls to Disney World and had a blast. It was just what the doctor ordered.” His smile was light and teasing. “How did things go here? I hope Jack wasn’t too much trouble.” 

Janet returned the general’s smile easily. “I had a few hectic days thanks to SG8 and SG12. Still have a couple of them recovering in the infirmary. But I’m happy to report that you’re returning to the same number of people you had before you left.” She chuckled a bit at the next part. “As for Colonel O’Neill, he was only a mild pain in my ass, Sir. So overall, everything went pretty well.”

“Good to hear, Doctor, good to hear.” Hammond replied. 

Apparently, the young idealist was going to be holding a televised news conference centered around what happened at the military summit, and General Hammond strongly recommended everyone watch it. Sam didn’t have a working television in her lab at the moment, she’d sort of salvaged hers for parts a week or so ago, so she decided to make her way to the commissary where she knew the tvs would be turned into the President. Before heading out, she rang up Janet’s office to see if she wanted to take a break with her to watch, and Janet agreed to meet her there. The infirmary level was closer to the commissary than Sam’s lab, so it wasn’t a surprise that Janet had gotten there first. Sam watched with a carefully measured smile as Janet snatched up the last slice of cheesecake and a tall glass of blue jello with whipped cream, before making her way over to the coffee station. 

“Hey,” Sam said gently so as not to startle Janet. “Need a hand with that?” 

Janet turned to smile at Sam and nodded. “Grab the coffee?” 

“Sure.” Sam replied. 

After plucking the coffee mugs from the tray Janet had placed their desserts on, Sam followed her through the maze of tables and a growing crowd of people to a table where Daniel sat with several notebooks and a couple of his smaller translation books. The trio chatted for a bit until Jack showed up and shoved Daniel’s papers out of the way to make room for his tray of pies, and one lone slice of carrot cake which he placed in front of Daniel. Just before the news conference began, while the talking heads were still rambling about their speculations on what the President was about to say, Teal’c joined them as well, though he did not bother grabbing a dessert, merely a mug of tea. 

“Did they run out of chocolate chips again, Teal’c?” Sam asked. Her hurt feelings had healed a bit over the last month, and she was at least making an effort these days. 

“Indeed.” Teal’c replied with a slight nod of his head. “There is only oatmeal raisin remaining.” 

“Yuck.” Jack said with a shudder. 

“Agreed O’Neill.” Teal’c nods. “Chocolate chip is the vastly superior cookie.” 

“I’m partial to snickerdoodles.” Janet adds in.

“Peanut butter.” Daniel throws out.

Sam bites her lip and shrugs. “I don’t mind oatmeal raisin.” Everyone turned to look at her like she was clearly out of her mind and could possibly be a goa’uld. “What? They’re not that bad!” 

The great cookie debate was cut short as people started shushing other people and the volume on the tvs were raised so everyone could hear clearly. The young idealist President stepped up to the podium, an honor guard made up of each branch of the military stood behind him in their dress uniforms, behind them, each of the flags of those respective branches were sandwiched between two American flags. The President began by thanking those who had served, were serving, and would serve, and then reminded everyone that their military was solely a volunteer military and had been since the end of the draft. He thanked his joint chiefs and the invited military officials who so graciously took the time to help better educate him, so that he could be the best commander in chief he could be for the nation. He then launched into what he had learned, and the ways in which he would seek improvement. Veteran’s Affairs, for example, was in dire need of restructuring so that the men and women who served would be better looked after when their call to duty had ended. He also wanted to ensure that those left behind by the brave men and women who made the ultimate sacrifice were better looked after. He also promised that the men and women actively serving would have what they needed to not only ensure their safety and ability to do their jobs, but maintain a livelihood suited to their dedication and service to their country and its people. 

“The men and women who so bravely and proudly dedicated their lives to the protection and preservation of our proud nation deserve better than to be asked to make the greatest of sacrifices while denied the right to live and serve with pride in themselves. It is unfair to these men and women, and to their families, and it stands against the very fabric of our beliefs of equality and freedom, to continue asking these brave, honorable, souls to serve their country from a closet.” The young idealist says after promising to make his changes without increasing the burden of cost on the taxpayers. 

Janet isn’t sure she’s following this correctly. Was this going where she thought it was going? She glances over at Sam and sees the same look of surprise mirrored in the tension around the blonde’s bright blue eyes. Then she turns her attention back to the tv screen where the President is talking about senate votes and an Act of Congress. She watches in stunned silence as he moves to a table where an open portfolio awaits along with a row of pens. He picks one up and begins to sign, and when he’s finished and showing off the official page with his signature that made an Act of Congress official, there was no longer a need for Janet to pretend or hide the fact that she and the person she loved were the same gender. 

Janet is brought out of her dazed and confused state by the sound of Sam choking on a square of blue jello which she’d eaten just as the words repeal and don’t ask don’t tell are spoken by the young idealist. Janet turns her attention quickly to the choking woman beside her and starts patting her back as Jack orders, “Swallow Major, it’s just jello!” 

“Such helpful medical advice, Sir.” Janet glares at him. 

“She swallowed it and now she’s breathing, so.” Jack shrugs and shoots them a grin. 

Their boys are all looking at them with expressions of joyful congratulations. The room is buzzing with the news. There’s no real time to talk or process, the conference is over, people are slowly returning to their work. Sam has a briefing. Janet’s got pre-mission checks to do on SG4. They catch each other’s eye and smile, it’s still a guarded look, a careful smile and a gleam in the eyes that’s quickly concealed with a blink. Janet refills her coffee mug and makes her way back to the infirmary. Sam walks beside Daniel who's softly whispering something to her, but she isn’t really paying much attention to what it is he’s saying. 

After finishing with the pre-mission medicals, Janet headed up to command to give the general her report on the SG teams status. Her work had kept her busy, leaving her without much time to think about what had happened, and what that would eventually mean. It was something she and Sam would have to talk about when they got home. On her way down to Hammond’s office, Janet found herself on the elevator with a sergeant from SG10, who looked as if he might cry. 

“Is everything alright Sergeant Winters?” Janet asked gently. 

The sandy haired man looked up and blinked, and when he recognized who was speaking to him, he went to attention. “Yes Ma’am, I’m fine Ma’am.” He answered her, but Janet’s expression was so soft and concerned he relaxed a bit and sighed. “It’s just that, well, I was just thinking about Robbie.” 

Second Lieutenant Roberto Hernandez was SG10’s tech guy. He was wounded in action against a hostile force while exploring a world for useful technology. Janet and Warner had done everything they could, but the weapons used had shredded the Lieutenant’s insides. Janet was about to try and say something comforting, it was never easy to lose one of their own, and even harder when it was a member of your unit, your team. Especially when those units were as small and close knit as the SG teams. But Winter’s cut her off before she could. 

“I was just thinking that if the President had done this just a couple of months sooner,” Winters paused, his eyes darting around as if making sure he and the CMO were still the only ones on the elevator. Then he looked at Janet and said, “Maybe they’d have given his flag to Joel, and not his parents who threw him out when he was seventeen, on account of who he was.” 

Reaching out Janet put her hand on Winters upper arm and squeezed reassuringly. “I’m so sorry his partner didn’t get the acknowledgement of his loss and his grief that he should have, Sergeant Winters. Maybe we can find a way to rectify that as soon as it’s officially possible.” 

“It would be great if we could, Ma’am.” Winters said. “They were together for ten years, celebrated with a trip to Maui last spring. Robbie was thinking of getting out so they could have a kid.” 

How many more of the men and women of the SGC lived secret lives with secret partners, Janet wondered as she made her way to Hammond’s office. How many flags had gone to the wrong person because no one had been allowed to know who the right person was? 

Sam was the first to make it home that night, which was rare, though she was getting better at being home by a normal-ish time these days. There had been an accident in one of the labs and Janet currently had her hands full with chemical burns and some breathing issues. Sam meanwhile didn’t have any pressing work to finish and couldn’t keep her mind on any of her side projects, so she’d decided to leave early before she burned herself with a soldering iron again. Stepping through the front door of Janet’s house, Sam spotted Cassie’s things thrown haphazardly off to the side and couldn’t help but smile. Janet was constantly scolding the girl about putting her things away where they belonged. 

Thinking of Cassie brought a sudden memory to Sam’s mind. Cassie had been sitting on the porch swing with ‘the boy’ as Sam called him, she knew his name was Dominic but didn’t care, and Sam had overheard them talking. 

“Is, um, your Mom, like dating Major Carter or something?” Dominic had asked. 

“Don’t be stupid!” Cassie had hissed at him in a warning tone. “They’re in the Air Force, they can’t date each other, they're just friends. Got it.”

Cassie’s life was so full of half-truths and lies without her having to cover for Sam and Janet. She was human, but not of Earth. Her birth parents died of an outbreak of disease, engineered by an egotistical megalomaniac space parasite. At least this was one thing they could take off her list of things she had to hide from people. Once the ink was dry on the repeal and the regs officially off the books, Cassie wouldn’t have to cover or lie for them anymore. 

“Cass?” Sam called out as she hung up her jacket. “Wanna give me a hand with dinner?” 

There was movement in the living room, shuffling and a soft thud, followed by a somewhat whispered, ‘Shit’ said by a voice that was not Cassandra’s. “Cassie?” 

‘The Boy’ was not supposed to be inside the house while Janet and Sam were gone. Sam practically threw the poor kid out on his ass. Cassie did not appreciate that which led to the argument she and Sam were having when Janet came home.

“...you and Mom don’t trust me!” Cassie’s voice rang out from the kitchen as Janet slipped out of her coat before heading towards the raised voices. 

“You haven’t exactly shown us we can, now have you?” Sam fired back.

“Hey,” Janet called out as she stepped into the room. “What’s going on?”

Cassie turned away from Sam to glare at her mother and pointed an accusing finger at the tall blonde currently trying to make dinner while fighting with her. “Sam assaulted Dominic!” 

Janet raised an eyebrow. Sam snorted. “I barely nudged the little twerp towards the door.” 

“You threw him out!” Cassie shot at Sam. 

“He shouldn’t have been here in the first place!” Sam shot back. 

“Stop.” Janet said, her voice a firm warning. “Cassandra, you know how we feel about having people over when one of us isn’t home, especially Dominic.” 

Cassie groaned in that way that only teenage girls could groan, where it sounded like a wounded whine and a challenging grunt all at the same time. “Why can’t you just trust me!” 

“Here we go again.” Sam moaned, and rolled her eyes. 

“We weren’t doing anything!” Cassie huffed. 

“Dominic’s complexion is why too dark for the shade of lip gloss his was wearing.” Sam snarked.

“Enough, both of you.” Janet was using that tone that caused both her daughter and her girlfriend to shut up and pout at her. “Cassandra, you and I will talk about you breaking the rules after dinner when you’ve calmed down. For now, go to your room, and take your crap with you, it doesn’t belong in a heap by the front door.” 

Cassie huffed dramatically at her mother but did as she was told. 

Once they were alone, the slamming of Cassie’s door providing the proof, Sam smiled sheepishly. “Hi.” 

“Hi.” Janet said with a soft chuckle and a shake of her head. While she was in no way thrilled by the idea of Cassie sneaking a boy into the house while she was at work, Janet did love the domesticity of coming home to her family, a family that no longer had to hide in the shadows. Making her way over to Sam to see what she was doing and to get a kiss hello, she teased, “Just a nudge towards the door, huh?” 

“I was practicing restraint.” Sam said, then happily gave Janet the kiss she was seeking. “Now that I won’t have to worry about being dishonorably discharged for kissing you, I don’t think I should press my luck by assaulting a minor.” 

Janet laughed, and then sobered a bit as she said, “So that wasn’t a hallucination caused by the chem spill in lab 38B?” 

Sam did a good imitation of her thinking face and then said, “It wouldn’t be the first mass group hallucination the SGC has had.” Then she smiled a huge, bright smile. “But no, it wasn’t a hallucination or a dream. Pretty soon I can stop pretending that I’m staying in your guest room because I can’t find the time to look for a house of my own.” 

Stepping closer to Sam, Janet smiles and takes a deep breath as if she’s finally able to breathe fully. “You could even have your mail sent here instead of using the p.o. box.” 

This time it was Sam who laughed. “Yeah, I suppose I could.” She pauses for a moment, turning this all over in her head yet again. “How do you want to handle this?” 

Brown eyes roamed over what Sam was doing and once Janet was sure it was something the blonde could walk away from for a moment without burning her kitchen down, she took Sam’s hand and led her over to the kitchen table. They sat side by side, facing each other, and Janet took a moment to sort out her thoughts. She’d had time to think on the way home, now she just needed to find the words to express herself. “I want to finally be honest with people about us. I want to be able to have a conversation with friends and not have to censor what I say or edit how I say it. I want to put your dress blues picture on my desk next to the one of us with Cassie at Disneyland.” She paused, the conversation she’d had earlier with Winters in the elevator coming to mind. “I want people to know that if, God forbid, something happened to you, they’re to hand your flag to me, and if something were to happen to me, they’re to hand my flag to you.” 

Sam felt as if there were something behind that last statement. She wanted to ask, but Janet wasn’t finished, so she’d wait and ask about it later. 

“But I don’t really feel the need to send out announcements.” Janet continued. “We’re not directly in each other’s chain of command, but we do still work together a lot, and I am still your CMO, and SG1 does end up in my infirmary more often than most of the other teams. I’d rather not give anyone a reason to question my ability to act as your doctor and treat you myself.” 

“Warner’s not a bad guy, but if someone has to shove a needle into my ass cheek, I’d much rather it be you.” Sam said with a nod of agreement. 

Janet chuckled softly. 

Sam agreed that they didn’t need any big coming out gestures. They both simply wanted to live their lives openly, and without fear of reprisal or reprimand. “What about our families?” Sam asked after explaining to Janet how she felt on the matter. “Does your mom know about you?”

“I’ve never come right out and told her.” Janet answered with a slight shake of her head. “But I think she might have known before I did.” She smiles fondly. “There was just something in the way she used to say, ‘He’s not your type, Janet!’ the entire time I was married to the jackass.” Maybe it was time for Janet to call and talk to her mom about who her type turned out to be. If nothing else, her mother would enjoy gloating if she was correct in her assumptions about the elder Fraiser knowing. “Are you going to tell Jacob?”

“Eventually.” Sam replies softly. “If that’s ok.” 

Janet leaned forward, placing her hands on Sam’s thighs, and looked her love in the eyes. “You’ll tell him when it’s right for you. I know it has nothing to do with me, I know it isn’t because you’re ashamed of us. You and your dad have a complicated and sometimes strained relationship. You’ll tell him when it feels right for you to tell him.” 

Sam’s smile was radiant as she leaned forward to press her lips to Janet’s. “Thank you.” She whispered as she pressed her forehead to her love’s. Then she sat back, her eyes twinkling. “You know what I want to do?” 

“What?” Janet asked, returning Sam’s smile easily. 

“Once we’ve gotten the official word from the Pentagon that the regs are officially null and void, I want to invite the guys over for a cookout or dinner or something.” Sam said, pulling Janet off her kitchen chair and into her lap. “Not to make a fuss or anything, just to have them over and to finally get to be us around them, no more having to pretend that we’re just friends. I just want one afternoon with the people we trust and care about, where I don’t have to think before I touch you or censor what I call you.” 

“I think that’s a great idea.” Janet smiled as she wrapped her arms around Sam’s neck before kissing her. 

About a month or so later Janet was flipping through a new medical journal while she prepped dinner, the radio playing quietly in the background. Cassie was in the backyard practicing her soccer drills. Sam was puttering around in the basement. It was a rare peaceful weekend afternoon. So peaceful in fact that Janet actually jumped at the sound of someone knocking on her front door. She had no idea who to expect on the other side, and General Hammond wasn’t even on the list of people she thought it could be, but there he was standing on her welcome mat in a pair of jeans and a polo shirt with a tiny Mickey Mouse on it. Janet blinked. “General Hammond, Sir. Is something wrong? Did something happen? Did…” 

Hammond chuckled and shook his head. “Stand down, Doctor. Everything’s fine. I’m not here officially.” 

Janet relaxed instantly and invited Hammond inside. “What can I do for you, Sir?” 

“I was hoping to speak with Sam.” Hammond replied warmly. 

Again, Janet blinked. Had she ever heard him call Sam by name before? She honestly wasn’t sure. “Of course, Sir.” Janet smiled and led him through her home to the back where the basement stairs were. “She’s downstairs tinkering with something or another.”

“Would you mind if I went down to speak to her alone?” Hammond asked. 

“Of course not, Sir.” Janet answered.

Hammond nodded his thanks, gave her a warm fatherly smile, and then decided the stairs into the basement of the Carter-Fraiser home. Sam was sitting at a workbench under an open window. It wasn’t surprising to find Sam at a workbench, but what she was working on did surprise him a bit. He waited a moment until she was finished with what she was doing before he spoke. “You’re still building model kits?” 

Sam jumped; she’d been focused on the delicate work of air brushing the 1970 Dodge Challenger she was building, and had zoned out to the music she had on. Turning to look at who had spoken, Sam leapt to her feet. “Sir.” But then she noticed what Hammond was wearing and relaxed. She even smiled at him in a much softer way than anyone was used to seeing her smile at the General. “Of course, I am.” She turned towards the shelves that lined the walls around her workbench and pointed out a cherry red 1957 Chevy Bel-Air. “I still have the first one you taught me to build.” 

Hammond smiled, touched that Sam would keep the little plastic toy they’d built together all those years ago. Then he smiled for another reason. “Before you ask, everything’s fine, I’m not here officially.” 

“I figured.” Sam replied easily. “Mickey polos aren’t really standard issue.” 

“Tessa picked it out.” Hammond told her before launching into why he was there. “Sam, there’s something I’ve been meaning to tell you, something I think you’ve needed to hear for a long time, but I couldn’t. Not until now. Not until I received word from Washington this morning.” He moved closer to her and looked right into her bright blue eyes. “Sam, I don’t give a damn who you love, as long as they make you happy. And I know without a doubt that Janet Fraiser makes you happy. She’s a damn fine woman, Sam. I am happy for you both.” 

Sam’s jaw dropped and her eyes went wide. Her heart paused, her lungs froze, and all higher brain functions seemed to short out. 

Hammond laughed. “You weren’t expecting that from your good ol’ boy Texan godfather, were you?” 

Sam shook her head, still in shock. 

“My younger brother David, he was a lot like you.” Hammond explained. “He should have gone off to college and become something impressive like an engineer or a scientist, but instead he was bullied by the older men in our family to join the army, to prove he was a real man. He was killed in Vietnam.” 

There was no need for more detail than that, Sam understood. “I’m so sorry, Uncle George.” She stepped closer to him and wrapped her arms around him in a tight hug. “And thank you,” Her voice cracked as he hugged her back. He gave the best hugs. “You have no idea how much hearing you say that means to me.” 

Before heading back upstairs Hammond couldn’t help but tease Sam. “I hope you know what you’re getting yourself into takin’ on a little spitfire like Janet. She reminds me of my Libby.” 

When the pair emerged from the basement and into the warmth of Janet’s kitchen she smiled at them, and then raised a little bit of an eyebrow at Sam who was smiling but Janet could see the sheen of tears in her eyes. Sam gave her a slight nod to let her know that everything was fine, and they'd talk later. “Would you like to stay for dinner, Sir?” 

Hammond accepted gladly. He didn’t get to spend much time with his people while off duty because his rank demanded that he keep some distance between himself and the people under his command. But Sam was family, and they had reason to celebrate. He was also tired of only getting to spend time with his friends outside of the mountain at wakes and funerals. Hammond told Janet about getting word from on high that the repeal was complete and official. When Sam went to the garage to get him a beer that wasn’t the Canadian beer they had in the kitchen fridge, Hammond took the opportunity to share his approval of them with Janet, which touched her greatly. When Sam returned and brought up wanting to have a cookout, Hammond promised to make sure there would be time put into the duty rosters for it.

It was a sunny summer day in Colorado Springs as everyone invited began to gather in Janet and Sam’s backyard. Laira was visiting from Edora for the third time and had come along with Jack. Her son, Garan, was to be married as soon as the harvest was complete, and had encouraged her to finally take Jack up on his offer to visit Earth. Janet liked her, she was good for Jack, and they were all hoping she’d be a second chance for him. 

“I don’t understand, Jack.” Laira said as they stood in the yard drinking and chatting. “Janet is clearly younger than you are. Why do you refer to her as old doctor Frasier?” 

“Because he’s an ass.” Janet replies without hesitation which makes both Sam and Daniel snort beer through their noses. Unlike Sam, Janet had no trouble setting aside ranks and titles. They were off duty, in a social setting, and she would not be calling anyone (but Hammond) sir today. Well, maybe almost unlike Sam. 

Jack shrugs with that boyish smile of his. “She ain’t wrong.” 

Teal’c had volunteered to go on a mission with SG12, which prompted Daniel to nag Sam about working towards forgiving him for what happened with Cassie. Sam threatened to spray him down with a water hose, so he backed off. When Janet said she agreed with Daniel, Sam threatened her with the water hose too. Janet snorted, “Do it and you actually will be sleeping in the guest room.”

The bold blunt reference to their sleeping arrangements in front of people made Sam hold her breath for a moment. Sam got some light ribbing from Jack about being henpecked by the little woman, which got some chuckles, but other than that there were no huge reactions, nothing negative or off putting. Just her friends reacting to one of Jack’s lame ass jokes and Janet’s slightly heated glare at being referred to as the ‘little woman’ in his teasing. Sam let out the breath she’d been holding and smiled. 

Daniel, never one to pass on a chance to tease Jack, asked. “So, Janet, just out of curiosity what is the biggest sized needle a little woman like yourself might have at your disposal?”

“Hey Carter!” Jack cut in quickly. “Grab your kid, and the boy making puppy eyes at your kid, and let's go play street hockey. You too Danny boy, let's go, and try to keep your trap shut huh?” 

Janet laughed as Jack got as far away from her as he could without actually leaving. 

All in all, it turned out to be a great day that rolled easily into a wonderful evening sitting around a small pit fire drinking and talking and just being together without the fears or concerns of something bad happening. No one had batted an eye at Sam calling Janet babe, or Janet’s respond of sweetheart or hon. No one was phased by how close they stood to one another, or when they would touch one another in an overly familiar way, or when Janet helped herself to Sam’s lap. Daniel smiled knowingly and happily when Janet had kissed Sam’s cheek, and he damn near choked from laughing while taking a swig of beer when she smacked Sam’s ass for stealing her last bite of food from her plate. Jack had given Sam a couple of warm, ‘I’m glad you’re happy’ smiles, which she easily returned after watching him with Laira. Teal’c presence was missed, and deep down Sam knew she would need to work on fixing their relationship, but for now she was content in knowing she and Janet had the support of the people who were important to them. With that feeling of acceptance and support they were ready to tackle whatever lay ahead of them, together.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As always, thank you for spending your time reading my fics and a extra thanks to all of you who commenting. 
> 
> ~Reese


End file.
